heathrow - HecklerSpray

Kimberley Walsh Misplaces Cheryl Cole In America

July 13th, 2011 By Michael Park

Worrying reports are flooding into the bedsit that Girls Aloud and (apparently) solo star Kimberley Walsh has managed to misplace long-time friend and band-mate Cheryl Cole while on holiday in America. News in recent weeks has suggested that Cheryl is trying to get her PR disaster of a career back on track but this latest navigational disaster could be the death-knell in the coffin of Chezza’s dreams of cracking America.

Cole and ‘Bez Friend Fo’evvvvaaaaa’ Kimberley Walsh had been enjoying a short holiday in Los Angeles for the past week but concerns have been raised when Walsh was seen at London’s Heathrow airport Arrivals area without her former band-mate.

The pair had been enjoying nights out in Hollywood with Cheryl’s brother Garry, not to mention hooking up with?Dancing With The Stars professional, Derek Hough. We’re not quite sure what ‘hooking up’ means in this context but if it transpires that anyhting has happened to the Geordie songstress and Will.I.Am fancier then he will have to numero uno on the list of suspects.

Sorry Lads, Kelly Brook And Danny Thingy Are Back Together… We Think

December 24th, 2010 By Kris Silver

Kelly Brook, the only girl who comes anywhere near matching the sheer loveliness of Zooey Deschanel, is off the market again by the looks of it.

The buxom British babe, star of Piranha 3D and? probably something else none of us can quite think of right now, apart from that issue of Playboy she got her norks out for obviously.

Apparently the lovely Kelly has jetted off to the Maldives with her ex Danny Caprisun, a bloke what plays Rugby, that sport where big men give each other special hugs whilst wearing tight tops and shorts.

The new Heathrow Airport Flashmob by T-Mobile

October 31st, 2010 By hecklerspray staff

If you were watching TV last night you will have found it hard to miss T-Mobile’s latest flashmob-based ad, which took place in Heathrow’s Terminal 5, in London.

The ad was shown simultaneously on 86 channels at 10.15pm, meaning that around one in six people in the UK will have seen it. In the event that you didn’t, here it is:

The mobile firm has a history of inviting people to flashmobs for a spot of public dancing. It then films them and turns them into ads. This one was filmed, edited and broadcast within 36 hours.

Thousands Of Non-Prostitute Masseuses Vie For Ewan McGregor’s Head

March 24th, 2009 By Shawn Lindseth

Whenever hecklerspray finds itself watching a film starring Ewan McGregor, we usually end up staring at his scalp.

It’s a clean scalp. it’s a healthy scalp, and we just really want to touch it. Not with our hands, of course – with a plank. We think it’d do good for both him, and his career. It’s a common thought, you know. People want to touch his head all the time.

That’s why a bunch of airport-masseuses recently had a throw down. Ewan walked in for a head massage and they all wanted to give it to him. It’s unknown how things got settled, but we bet the actor ended up with mayonnaise saturating his hair, cucumber-slices prying his eyes open, and free-range dung beetles nesting in all his body holes.

Our mother told us about the goings-on in those horrible places. They’re all dens of sin.

Naomi Campbell Arrested For Giant Airport Strop-Attack

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

The Heathrow Terminal 5 situation is worse than we thought – it's managed to make Naomi Campbell angry, and nothing makes Naomi Campbell angry.

Wait, sorry, that's a typo. That last bit should have read 'everything makes Naomi Campbell angry. Everything. Even buttercups and pictures of big-eyed bunny rabbits. Everything.' Sorry.

So Naomi Campbell got angry at Heathrow airport. How angry? Arrested for attacking a policeman angry. That's good anger but not great anger, Naomi, and we're a little bit disappointed. Next time try kicking a wing off or hiding a bomb in your shoe or something.