George Lucas: I May Well Make Indiana Jones 5 & I May Well Ruin It Further George Lucas has come up yet with another plan to convince you to hand over your hard earned money to him. After he made millions with Indiana Jones 1, he sat down for a while, thought about what to do next and came up with Indiana Jones 2. It worked. But what next? He sat down for a while, thought about what to do next and came up with Indiana Jones 3. Incredible. How was he to beat that? It wasn't easy. For twenty years he brooded, furrowing his brow and scratching his little beard, and finally his eureka moment came: Indiana Jones 4. But, people asked, what about the fact that Indiana Jones will be far too old? Don't worry, said George, if we make jokey references to it throughout the film no one will care. Wow, he's good. What next? George says 'how about Indiana Jones...5, with Shia Labeouf as the lead?' Time to retire George.

Harrison Ford: Duping Archaeology Geeks Everywhere and Loving It

Archaeologists have made a stunning discovery.

After weeks of carefully sifting through piles of rubbish, they came across a fossil that they saw as another useless dinosaur, but wait! It’s not just a useless dinosaur; it’s a useless dinosaur with an earring! It must be Harrison Ford. The discovery was confirmed by the presence of a frail skeleton next to the fossil that was classified as ‘the old dinosaur’s girlfriend, Calista Flockhart’.

All of this excitement has prompted the American Archaeological Society to put Harrison Ford on the board of directors. So, we may be a bit fuzzy on the details, but the board of directors thing is for reals.