Hey kids, are you excited about the Hannah Montana movie? You are? Well you’re doing better than Miley Cyrus, then.

Because Miley Cyrus, um, isn’t. Even though Hannah Montana: The Movie comes out in less than a fortnight, Miley Cyrus is already so bored of the whole thing that she’s ruled out the possibility of making any sequels to it.

You know what this means – no Hannah Montana 2. And no Hannah Montana 3: Hannah’s Big City Vacation. And no Hannah Montana 4: Aquatic Adventuresplash. And no Hannah Montana 5: Requiem For A Tween. Miley Cyrus, you can really be an awful cow sometimes.

If anything ever derails Miley Cyrus’ career in the future, it’s not going to be her weird compulsion to take her clothes off on the internet, her terrifying propensity for possibly accidental racism or the way that her speaking voice sounds like Mumm-Ra’s emphysemic death rattle. No, it’ll be a lack of motivation that does Miley Cyrus in.

Because why would Miley Cyrus want to do anything more with her life? She’s already living a 16-year-old’s dream life – fame, no school, enough money to physically and emotionally bulldoze her parents into doing exactly what she wants, a topless grown-up underwear model to roll around with – so doing anything at all must feel like a terrible chore for her.

That’s why there’s a constant question mark hanging over the future of Hannah Montana, and we’d imagine it’s why – during the world premiere of the Hannah Montana movie trailer – Miley Cyrus was pulling a face like a cat that’s just belched a dogturd up into the back of its throat.

Is it the reason why Miley Cyrus is refusing to make any more Hannah Montana movies after this one this released? Possibly, although Miley’s buggered if she’s going to actually admit it. USmagazine reports:

“I feel like this is a TV show, and we got really lucky with having the material to make one movie,” the actress/singer said Monday, reports UsMagazine.com. “To do another one, I feel like it takes away the reality of it all.”

Miley Cyrus does have a point, of course – making a sequel to a movie adaptation of a money-spinning TV show about a girl with a secret pop star identity, starring the millionaire daughter of the rat-tailer performer of 1992 country crossover hit Achey Breaky Heart would totally take away the reality of it all. Well done Miley. Good use of common sense.

But all joking aside, it’s easy to understand why Miley Cyrus wants to draw a line under Hannah Montana. Keep doing it too long and she’ll end up as a dumpy Sabrina The Teenage Witch-style joke. Besides, Miley probably has so much left that she wants to accomplish professionally. That emotional meltdown and subsequent slow descent into paranoid drug hell won’t just happen by itself, you know.

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Ready for the first Hannah Montana movie trailer? Good, because Miley Cyrus doesn’t seem to be.

You see, it’s obvious that Miley Cyrus really, really doesn’t want you to go and see the Hannah Montana movie when it’s released in April. That’s why she’s gone out of way to make the whole thing seem as grossly appalling as possible.

Look, there’s Miley Cyrus introducing the movie with the voice of a chainsmoking miniature troll who’s been possessed by the devil! Look, Miley Cyrus can’t stop pulling a genuinely disturbing look of self-hatred every time she says her own name!

What? There’s still a part of you that wants to go and see the Hannah Montana movie? Wait – Miley Cyrus isn’t done yet! Look, here’s Miley robotically referring to the Hannah Montana movie as “her first big-screen adventure” – which is essentially a slightly shorter way of saying “her integral second-quarter generic mass-marketed media, stationery or sweatshop-produced fashion product.” Here’s an insufferable berk on a horse! Here’s an actual verbal promise of an appearance by Rascal Flatts! Boy oh boy, this Hannah Montana movie is going to be awesome!