Oh SpongeBob SquarePants! You lovable oaf you! You’re like a diet Ren & Stimpy and we can’t knock you for it. You’re a delightfully odd chap and have delightfully odd chums.

However.

Things have taken a turn for the worse for SpongeBob as it transpires via various reports that he’s been arrested outside Grauman’s Chinese Theatre in Hollywood! And we’ve got the photographic evidence! And it’s not us doing some dodgy photoshopping either.

SpongeBob was detained by police in Hollywood, officials said Wednesday.

What could SpongeBob possibly have done wrong? He’s too nice, tantrums aside, to get the cuffs slapped on him… surely?

Well, a Los Angeles Police Department official described the incident as a “brief incident with two females.”

No other details were available.

The photo of the crime scene on Hollywood Boulevard was taken by Steve Boelhouwer, via the LA Times.

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If you like looking at the hands and feet of Hollywood stars, there’s only one place to go – a mental hospital.

Or Grauman’s Chinese Theatre. But a mental hospital would probably make more sense, you creepy sod. Anyway, fans of seeing what some famous people’s hands look like have now got another reason to visit Grauman’s Chinese Theatre – because now they can see what Hugh Jackman‘s hands look like.

Because now Hugh Jackman’s hands and footprints have been immortalised in concrete there, alongside the notice ‘HUGH JACKMAN (you know, Hugh Jackman from Wolverine. Wolverine. It came out in 2009. No? Anyone?)’.

Anyone visiting Hollywood for the first time will have several destinations on their must-see list. The Hollywood sign, Universal Studios and, for anyone who likes being harassed by awful people dressed as mutanty versions of semi-beloved animation characters, Grauman’s Chinese Theatre.

That last one’s just become a little more must-see, though, because now – alongside said mutants, hopeless souvenirs that you wouldn’t give to your worst enemy and pickpockets – there’s Hugh Jackman’s handprint. Yesterday Hugh Jackman became the latest star to be immortalised outside Grauman’s Chinese Theatre, alongside such luminaries as the cast of Ocean’s 13 and Jean Simmons. No, not Gene Simmons. Jean Simmons. She was in Black Narcissus. Anyway, Reuters reports:

“It’s a very humbling moment as an actor to be here. You look down at the names, from Fred Astaire to Cary Grant, Clint Eastwood, Al Pacino, Steve McQueen, John Wayne, and to think that those people have been immortalized and pretty soon I’ll be putting my hands in wet cement,” Jackman said, before planting his palms in the concrete.

Hugh Jackman is in impressive company there, we’ll admit. Fred Astaire, who popularised dance on film. Steve McQueen, who redefined masculine cool throughout his career. Clint Eastwood, who’s arguably one of the most famous men of the last century. Hugh Jackman, who’s made a stupid film about a man with spiky hands blowing all sorts of crap up. Immortal, the lot of them.

Actually, we’re just kidding. Hugh Jackman deserves his place in the concrete – in the last 12 months he’s been named as the sexiest man in the world and has hosted the Oscars, and right now he’s on the brink of releasing what could be one of the year’s biggest movies.

Plus there’s a pretty good chance that Hugh Jackman will go down in history as the first actor whose career has been completely derailed by online leaks, and so it’d be better to get him now before he chops his hands and feet off in a flurry of drunken, destitute self-pity. It’s just more practical this way, trust us.

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