Gethin Jones - HecklerSpray

Strictly Come Dancing Betting Odds: Gethin Gone, Matt To Win?

August 5th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

The Strictly Come Dancing final takes place this Saturday, but poor old Gethin Jones – who was eliminated last week – won't be taking part.

Gethin Jones was voted off Strictly Come Dancing on Saturday night after getting just a teensy bit too big for his boots. It literally took Gethin Jones months to learn how to emote properly during a dance, but on Saturday his emotion warped into a horrible sort of self-parody – we can't even remember the dances that he did because we were too busy looking at all the weird faces that he and his Strictly Come Dancing partner kept making at each other. Unless the story of their dance really was about a gay vampire chasing a woman with brainfreeze, in which case it was uncanny.

Who'll win the Strictly Come Dancing final on Saturday? here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for Matt Di Angelo, with help from Paddy Power…

Strictly Come Dancing Betting Odds: Gethin Jones To Win?

September 16th, 2008 By Stuart Heritage

Strictly Come Dancing is now a three-horse race, with just Matt Di Angelo, Gethin Jones and Alesha Dixon left to hoof it out for that ugly shiny ball-trophy thing.

And the pressure couldn’t be greater on the three of them to win Strictly Come Dancing, where they’ll join the esteemed ranks of Natasha Kaplinsky, Jill Halfpenny, Phil Tufnell, Joe Pasquale, Baby Spice and Leona Lewis as a Strictly Come Dancing champion. No, wait, did Baby Spice win Strictly Come Dancing? Or was it that four-year-old from EastEnders? Oh, we get so confused sometimes.

Anyway, who’ll win Strictly Come Dancing? Here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for Gethin Jones, with help from Paddy Power…

Strictly Come Dancing Betting Odds: Kenny Logan Didn’t Win

August 5th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

We knew the day was coming when Kenny Logan would be voted off Strictly Come Dancing, and yet it still killed us to see it happen.

Nothing could stop Kenny Logan being eliminated from Strictly Come Dancing – not his partner variously trying Gordon The Gopher around her wrist and using Kenny as a burly stripper’s pole, and certainly not Kenny aiming to express ‘romance’ and ending up looking like a recently-neutered bear who was sad because he missed his balls. Strictly Come Dancing won’t be the same without you, Kenny Logan. But that’s mostly because everyone left can actually dance.

But now that Kenny Logan is no longer a part of Strictly Come Dancing, who’s going to win? Here’s part one of this week’s Strictly Come Dancing betting odds – for Matt Di Angelo and Gethin Jones – with help from Paddy Power…

Strictly Come Dancing Betting Odds: John Barnes Gone, Who’ll Win?

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Sooner or later the Strictly Come Dancing contestants are going to have to learn that anyone who throws an on-camera strop will get voted out – just like Dominic Littlewood and, on Saturday’s show, John Barnes.

John Barnes: brilliant when he’s asked to do a Strictly Come Dancing latin dance, but useless if he’s asked to do a Strictly Come Dancing ballroom dance. Everyone knows that. But that theory took a beating on Saturday, when John’s Samba to Sir Juke was all flabby and out of shape. Sure, he wiggled his hips around like he was trying to loosen up a colon-impacted turd, but nothing more. And as well as the technique being a bit out, John Barnes also made the routine look roughly as fun as regrouting a mid-sized bathroom. And then threw a wobbly when he got crap scores. No wonder he got eliminated.

But who’s going to win Strictly Come Dancing if John Barnes isn’t? Here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for Gethin Jones, Letitia Dean and Kelly Brook, with help from Paddy Power…

Strictly Come Dancing Betting Odds: Matt Di Angelo To Win?

August 5th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

It’s a weird thought, that Strictly Come Dancing will happen tomorrow without Kate Garraway plonking around like a woman without any knees – it’s almost like the Strictly Come Dancing judges are winning.

We can’t let this happen. It’s a little-known fact that when a bad dancer is voted off Strictly Come Dancing, a fairy dies. And is that what you want? Is it? Dead fairies all over the place? No, of course not. That’s why it’s imperative that you keep Kenny Logan in Strictly Come Dancing tomorrow. Yes, the judges will all go bright purple if he isn’t voted out and, yes, he’s very obviously useless at dancing. But Kenny Logan represents the underdog in all of us, and to vote him out would be to succumb to the bullies, to the bosses, to everyone who’s ever held you back in life. Plus he dances like an idiot and it’s funny.

Who’s going to win Strictly Come Dancing this year? Here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for Gethin Jones, John Barnes, Alesha Dixon and Matt Di Angelo, with betting odds from Paddy Power…

Strictly Come Dancing Betting Odds: Penny Out, Who’ll Win?

August 5th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

Penny Penny Penny, when will you learn? On Strictly Come Dancing Penny Lancaster has shown that if she put her hair up and danced an old-fashioned ballroom dance she’d sail through the elimination process easily.

So what did Penny Lancaster do on Saturday’s Strictly Come Dancing? She let her hair down and tried to be energetic, that’s what. On Saturday’s Strictly Come Dancing, Penny decided to dance the Salsa to something that may as well have been Agadoo for all the bloody good it did her. Aiming for ‘vivaciously sexy’ and ending up with something appropriating ‘epileptic woman being exorcised at a disco’, Penny’s bewildering effort left the Strictly Come Dancing viewers wondering if her remote control vibrator was somehow stuck on the ‘destroy’ setting. Needless to say that Penny Lancaster is now out of Strictly Come Dancing for good.

But without Penny Lancaster, who’ll win Strictly Come Dancing this year? Here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for Gethin Jones, Matt Di Angelo, Kate Garraway and Letitia Dean, with betting odds from Paddy Power…

Strictly Come Dancing Betting Odds: Dominic Out, Who’ll Win?

August 5th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

On Saturday tiny wee slaphead Dominic Littlewood was the latest semi-celebrity to get voted off Strictly Come Dancing, which seemed to come as a surprised to nobody except Dominic Littlewood himself.

Dominic Littlewood's stock in trade – apart from his ability to haggle three pence off the price of a new car on daytime TV – is his cheekiness. However, that went on Saturday's Strictly Come Dancing because he was dancing a Paso Doble to El Gato Montez, which apparently called for lots of marching around like a midget Hitler out of time to the music while dressed as a gay Libertine. But, as you may have expected, the most convincing part of Dominic Littlewood's performance came when he had an embittered tantrum about how nobody likes him afterwards. Even Bruce Forsyth started slating Dominic at one point, and his tolerance for awfulness is so high that he counts Jimmy Tarbuck as a friend.

Who's going to win Strictly Come Dancing? Here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for Kelly Brook, John Barnes, Letitia Dean, Gethin Jones and Kenny Logan, with help from Paddy Power…

Strictly Come Dancing Betting Odds: Penny Lancaster Next Out?

August 5th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

It’s the next edition of Strictly Come Dancing tomorrow, and everyone wants to know whether there’ll be another shock result like last week, and also whether everyone is going to react as if their children died like last week too.

Having said that, the shock Strictly Come Dancing exit of Gabby Logan last week was fairly entertaining, not least because Len Goodman – a man who sat stony-faced when that Osmond woman collapsed in front of her recently – has turned into the world’s most furious man because the public didn’t vote properly. So let’s try and get another favourite out tomorrow, because we get the feeling Len might squirt his brain out of his nose in disgust if we do.

Who’ll be the next to leave Strictly Come Dancing tomorrow? Here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for Kelly Brook, Gethin Jones, Letitia Dean, Penny Lancaster and Matt Di Angelo, with help from Paddy Power…