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Finally! America Has Come To Make Doctor Who Brilliant!

November 15th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Doctor Who has always been a quirkfest, with machines that don’t work properly, stupidly long scarves, baddies that look like bits of tinfoil and something preposterously called ‘a sonic screwdriver’.

Really, The Doctor is, of all the heroes, the most nauseatingly twee. He’ll be playing a bloody ukulele next. A sonic ukulele no doubt.

Anyway, thank frig the Americans have shown up to save this sorry franchise with some razzle and dazzle. That’s right! America will be getting their hands on Doctor Who and making the explosions bigger, the Doctor more handsome, throwing in a sex scene or two and making him have a proper spaceship as opposed to a stupid telephone box. WHO EVEN USES TELEPHONE BOXES ANYMORE? HAVEN’T THE WRITERS HEARD OF MOBILE PHONES?

Nicki Minaj To Release New Material As A Fruity Gay Man

November 9th, 2011 By Matthew Laidlow

To be a successful female in modern America, you have to release records that are edgy, oozing with sex and somehow able to offend various subsections of society or else you’re just old fashioned.

Rihanna constantly tells us how she likes to engage in adult activities, Lady Gaga likes to dress up as meat and Beyonce likes to fake pregnancies (if the mentalist rumours are true). So where does Nicki Minaj fit in?

Some say she bypasses all of the above shock factors and does an alright job of reinventing female rap. Previously, Nicki Minaj upset America when her right boob popped out to say hello. Now conservative types will probably get into a fluster as she prepares to release new songs as a gender bender.

Heidi Klum’s Best Halloween Outfits

October 31st, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Halloween is just about the perfect festival. Why? Well, because there’s no stupid religion involved, you can get as drunk as you like, guilt free.

GUILT FREE!

Better yet, you can get drunk while dressed as a brain-eating zombie. What’s not to like? Apart from trick or treating children. NOTHING. THAT’S WHAT. And someone who really, really enjoys Halloween is Heidi Klum. She makes a real effort this time of year and so, we’re having a look at her best outfits from her Halloween ball.

Drake And Minaj Make Wettest Record Ever

October 14th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Drake is one of the world’s most hyped rappers on the planet despite releasing lame song after lame song. And his latest album, Take Care, has been delayed, presumably because it’s so poor that it’s hiding under the stairs, surrounded by people trying to cajole it outside.

As a teaser for just how lame it is, a new song called Make Me Proud featuring Nicki Minaj, has been leaked.

Yes, you can hear it over the jump and yes, Drizzy (when will this ‘izzy/’eezy thing end?) showcases rap in the style of The Little Book Of Calm. Again.

Nicki Minaj Once Considered Suicide, But Didn’t Do It, So Who Cares?

October 10th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

You. You’ve thought about dying. Of course you have. You’re a pathetic excuse for a human. Look at you. You’re an embarrassment compared to your friends with their careers, savings, mortgages and stupid pets.

Of course, they’re worthless and resentful as well. They know people doing even better than they are. And this continues all the way to the toppermost of the poppermost, where they tell us, it’s lonely at the top.

And so, the entire human race wants to die. And Nicki Minaj is expecting us to give two hoots about the fact that she wanted to die before she was famous because she’s foolish enough to think that fame will solve her demons. HAHAHA!

Nicki Minaj?s Nipple Upsets The Whole Of America

August 17th, 2012 By Matthew Laidlow

How did people entertain themselves in the days before electricity was invented? Imagine life a trillion billion years ago when there was nothing on the planet apart from your fellow human and stupid animals. People actually had to use their brains to amuse themselves, urgh.

Caveman drawings have given a small glimpse into what our ancestors got up to, but there's one activity that is as popular as it ever was, and it involves the humble nipple.

From self exploration of your own, to nipple twisting someone else?s to cause them pain, its fun for everyone involved. You?d assume that everybody would embrace their bodies and not become overly offended by something they already have. Think again morons, because over in America, the sight of a nipple causes a blazing uproar and during a recent performance for Good Morning America, Nicki Minaj offended everyone. And probably Jebus.

Nicki Minaj Fined Hilarious Amount For Potty Mouthed Appearance

July 27th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Despite the music industry being in some kind of financial crisis, it doesn’t stop certain artists from flaunting their gargantuan wealth and having wardrobes that are more expensive than absolutely everything in Ireland and Greece combined.

And so, when we need to make an example of them, we try and throw the book at them right? Try and teach them a lesson for having the audacity to be massively successful.

With that, cartoon rap sensation Nicki Minaj has been fined for swearing her way through a performance at a Jamaican music festival. In Jamaica, they don’t like the swearing, but overtly homophobic dancehall records are just fine. So how much did the obscenely wealthy Minaj get slapped with?

Kanye’s Ex, Amber Rose, In Trouble After Very Explicit Nude Photo Leak

July 1st, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Kanye West’s ex-gal Amber Rose is in all kinds of trouble at the moment after some very, very explicit pictures leaked online. They weren’t the only things leaking. The model has now been dropped by her bookers and Nicki Minaj might be pretty peeved too.

The images show Rose butt-naked apart from some expensive looking shoes and… well… y’know… sticking things inside her. This, of course, hasn’t gone down well at all with her employees.

But what’s Nicki Minaj got to do with anything? And yes. We have the pictures over the jump you filthy swine.

Karen Gillan And The Word Naked Is Very Search Term Friendly, Despite Being Old News (We Have A Picture Though)

June 28th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Yesterday, we completely forgot to write about Karen Gillan being found naked on the floor of a hotel in New York. Despite the fact it is quite literally yesterday’s news, everyone still seems to be talking about it today.

So of course, not wanting to miss out on that lovely traffic, invariably being swept up by slow-reacting newspapers that only grabbed a hold of the story today, we’re going to write about it as well.

So yeah. Karen Gillan. Naked. A Doctor Who companion with no clothes on, like that woman who got naked with a Dalek that one time.

Hecklerspray’s Nude Celebrity Breakdown: Spring 2011

December 23rd, 2016 By Kris Silver

Spring is in the air, those gloomy winter days are behind us for another year and we can look forward to all of the joys that the sunshine brings: flowers blooming, birds singing and, most importantly, BOOBS!

That's right, it's the time of year where celebrity clothes disappear at the same rate as clouds.

This week we've been treated to many a celebrity disrobing, so we?ll break them down one by one… over the jump you penises.