Awesome or Off-Putting is a weekly delve into cryptozoology, ufology, aliens, medical marvels, scientific wonders, secret societies, government conspiracies, cults, ghosts, EVPs, ancient artifacts, strange facts, odd sightings or just the plain unexplainable.

If you stumbled across the body of an alien, what would you do with it? Other than taste it, we mean. We’re a bit dog-like that way. If you ever see us in the park gnawing on a squirrel leg, that’s why.

After we’d given that alien body a good chew, though, we’d see if we could sell it somewhere. For millions in Chinese dollars, whatever those are called. We definitely wouldn’t keep it in the freezer portion of our cheaply made Russian refrigerator. That’s what Marta Yegorovnam did when she found one.

And now she’s ready to tell you all about it.

Every now and again somebody somewhere finds a very well preserved alien body that they won’t let anyone see, touch or sniff. Remember the one found in the Andes that we told you about a while ago? Well another one just popped up.

A woman found the body a few years ago – we’ll let the Daily Mail tell you about it:

“After other claims of extraterrestrial life turning up in Siberia, the latest is from a Russian woman who says she kept a frozen alien corpse in her fridge. The mysterious ‘lifeform’ was reportedly kept by Marta Yegorovnam in her fridge in the western Russian city of Petrozavodsk for two years, while she took five pictures to prove its existence.

“The ‘body’, the third alien sighting in Russian in recent months, was reportedly retrieved by Miss Yegorovnam from a UFO crash site near her summer house in 2009. She says she approached the flaming wreckage and crumpled metal which she described as ‘unbearably hot’ and near the twisted hulk lay the dead alien. The ‘creature’ is two feet long, has an enormous head, large bulbous eyes and an appearance somewhere between a fish and a humanoid. It also appears to have what looks like a string-like arm protruding from its body.”

And there you have it. You should really scoot on over to the previously mentioned website if you want to see more pictures. If you want to see the actual body though – forget about it. It was confiscated by some goons from something called the Karelian Research Center of the Russian Academy of Sciences.

We don’t know what that is, and we’re too lazy to Google it.

The point is – Yegorovnam brilliantly built in a piece to her story that will keep her little frozen friend from being examined.

Whether the body is real or not – it sure looks like it’s be fun to chew on. If it squeaks with every bite we’d be all the more sold.

Awesome or Off-Putting is a weekly delve into cryptozoology, ufology, aliens, medical marvels, scientific wonders, secret societies, government conspiracies, cults, ghosts, EVPs, myths, ancient artifacts, religion, strange facts, odd sightings or just the plain unexplainable.

Dear everybody,

Well, they found Bigfoot’s body, and it’s currently being kept in a freezer. The long question of whether the thing exists or not is finally answered.

Or so say the two guys with the freezer.

Evidence of Bigfoot has long been floating about – the problem is it’s always weak evidence. Last time we told you the proof was in the form of foot steps heard deep in the woods with an electronic ear, and how no creature known to man has ever snapped twigs quite in that pattern while walking.

A few years ago we told you about the kid who video taped a sasquatch, but then couldn’t remember quite where the encounter happened, and was in a big hurry to talk dollar signs. Also, there’s the child molestor, who himself was once molested – by a Bigfoot.

This time around it’s two guys (Rick Dyer & Matthew Whitton) in the woods. They run some sort of Bigfoot hunting business, and on a fairly recent expedition stumbled upon a pretty intact hair-covered carcass. Reportedly, they dragged it out of there while other sasquatch watched from the side lines. They made it all the way to a plugged-in gigantic freezer, and are currently keeping the beast quite preserved.

They were going to present incredibly solid evidence that the monster exists last Friday at a press conference – but they didn’t.  Here’s the New York Times’ take on things:

“One photograph provided to the news media showed what resembled a gorilla — or maybe an old sheepskin rug — lying twisted in a freezer, with a dollop of intestines protruding from its belly. “There’s a lot of comment being made that it looks fake, or it looks like a suit,” Mr. Dyer said. “But these people wasn’t there when I was sweating, pulling this thing through the woods.”

But that was written before the big news conference. More recently we have something from the Sydney Morning Herald:

“They didn’t produce a Bigfoot corpse; that is in a hidden location, they said, after being moved from a freezer that broke down a couple of times. They will not say exactly where they found the creature and claim they saw a band of other Bigfoots watching them. Neither will they allow anyone other than their own hand-picked scientists to examine the body of the dead animal.

“We’re now the best Bigfoot hunters in the world,” said Matthew Whitton, 31. Whitton and his hiking partner, Rick Dyer, 28, wore the hats to prove it, advertising their website. Mr Whitton is a police officer who is on disability leave; Mr Dyer is a car salesman and tow-truck operator.”

It’s not looking good at this point. But then it doesn’t have to. You know their website is currently being ransacked by a curious public – bringing in loads of advertising money. Their tour business might even be picking up – $150 for an overnight hike and as many Costco-brand granola bars as you can eat.

We don’t actually know their price chart or services rendered.

What we think is this – there are two many sasquatch encounters reported each year for it to be nothing – but this ain’t it.

It could, however, explain where Harriette Winslow from Family Matters has been lately. Seriously – what happened to her?