Posts tagged as:

football

Sporting Fails: The Worst Shot In The World

by Matthew Laidlow

In 1966, football was a totally different game. Not to the extent that players had a half time lager instead of Lucozade, but they were generally better at doing what they were employed to do. Amazingly, this was just to kick a rock solid leather ball around whilst occasionally digging out lumps of an opposition’s [...]

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Why Both Fifa and Pro Evo Fail To Be Realistic In 2010

by Kris Silver

Fifa vs Pro Evo. It’s a battle that has caused many a forum argument and playground bullying campaign as people try to decide which provides the better footballing experience. A battle that has had fresh life breathed into it with the release of the demo versions of Fifa 11 and Pro Evo 11 on both [...]

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Peter Crouch Lambasts The Sun Over Pregnancy Story… But Doesn’t Mind Prostitute Story It Seems

by Mof Gimmers

Peter Crouch is a rare fish isn’t he? He’s about 60ft tall and 3 inches wide. He looks like Brassneck from The Dandy if he was made with straws by toddlers at a playgroup. Yet, despite all this, he’s a rather talented footballer. Of course, him being a footballer means that he’s prone to monumental [...]

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Jay Z First Buys Will Smith’s Daughter Willow – Next Stop, Arsenal Football Club

by Mof Gimmers

Jay Z is an incredibly busy human being for someone who has retired a million times already. Since he decided to lead a quiet life, he’s married the most famous woman on the planet, released records, headlined Glastonbury, headed up a massive record label and recently, played the first ever show at the brand new [...]

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Sky Sports News Disappears From Freeview, National Day Of Mourning Declared

by Kris Silver

Men, the day we have been dreading for weeks has finally come and gone, Sky Sports News is no longer available on Freeview in the UK. That’s right, no more up to date analysis, no more SoccerSaturday and, of course, no more Georgie Thompson. I know it hurts but we have to face facts, no [...]

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Unsurprisingly, Abbey Clancey Moves Out of Peter Crouch’s Presumably Giant House

by Mof Gimmers

Did you read The Dandy? Ever looked at Peter Crouch and thought to yourself “Ah! That’s what happened to Brassneck!”? No? You’re an idiot. Anyway, Peter Crouch has been a bit of a favourite amongst many because he’s seemed like a nice chap and owned that rarest of footballing traits – self deprecation. And then he stuck his long, thin penis into a prostitute.

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Creased or Folded? hecklerspray Tells You the Way it is

by Chris Laverty

Thumbs up and thumbs down. Folded: This headline (so spot on it hurts) Cricket (does anybody know we’re actually good at this?) This trailer for The Social Network (which does have Justin Timberlake in it, but is directed by David Fincher and written by Aaron Sorkin) No more talking about sport for a bit (back [...]

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Badvertising: Worst World Cup Ads

by Steve Charnock

World Cup excitement has reached fever pitch. Fever pitch. That was a joke; see how easily they come to us? Fantastic… We’ve all watched a lot of football recently. We’ve all watched a lot of football adverts recently as well. Here are the four worst World Cup ads, the four that make us wish we [...]

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You! Buy Snoop Dogg’s Non-Golden Garden Shed! On eBay!

by Shawn Lindseth

Do the 18″ spinning rims on your lawn mower get rain-spotted because you don’t have any kind of a structure to keep it in? Is your rake plated in gold but you’d never know it because it got lost under a pile of leaves last fall due to piss poor tool organisation? Whenever you’re in [...]

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Steve McClaren Adopts a Flawless Dutch Accent

by Ian Dransfield

Football: technically a funny old game. Made more so with ex-England football team manager Steve McClaren, in his new role at Dutch side FC Twente. The man with a head that is home to a hair island and a face that wears a frighteningly creepy smile at all times has been spotted in the wild [...]

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