Eva Mendes - HecklerSpray

Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes are Married AF

September 21st, 2016 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

As someone who once teared up during the films Drive and Crazy, Stupid, Love for the sole reason that I knew I was never going to get to sleep with Ryan Gosling, it pains me to announce that that is probably true for every woman other than Eva Mendes, because those two got secret married.

This isn’t like a recent thing, apparently it happened earlier this year, but those two are private AF. First they have two secret babies that I have never seen, then they get secret married. I’m actually really offended that they are refusing to let me be a part of their lives. They don’t know how to celebrity at all.

Hot Canadian Babies Are Coming

April 15th, 2016 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

hot

Two of the hottest men in Hollywood for the past decade have been a couple of Canadian dudes named Ryan (Gosling and Reynolds, respectively). I mean they’re both mega hot, ripped, funny, and extremely talented. They also dress well. They’re the type of guys you’d want to punch in the face for being so fucking perfect if it weren’t for the fact that they also seem pretty likable, as well.

Anyway, Hot Ryan #1 (Gosling) and Hot Ryan #2 (Sorry Ryan Reynolds, Gosling has been my #1 since his days on “Breaker High), both shacked up with Hollywood mega babes (Gosling with the exotic Eva Mendes and Reynolds with the basic-but-beautiful Blake Lively) and produced what are sure to be two of the most beautiful girls on the face of the planet, and, apparently, they’ve done it again!

Eva Mendes Nudes Will Make You Happy – Look at This! (PICS)

We love latinas. Especially if they’re hot. Like Eva Mendes. Who is totally hot. And nude. Right here. On this page. Why hello there. And welcome.

American actress Eva Mendes started her career in crappy B-movies but she bared her boobs and butt as Denzel Washington’s wife in Training Day and everything was all smooth after that. Skin goes a long way in Hollywood (Sofia Vergara knows that). Especially if you’ve got a great natural body.

10 Things to Get Jazzed About in 2015

January 31st, 2015 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

The first month of 2015 has almost come to an end, and so far it’s been moderately eventful (emphasis on moderate). In the world of celebrity, it’s hard to predict what the?big stories and scandals of the year are going to be, but there are always a few things we know are going to happen that we can look forward to.

Here’s a countdown of 10 pop culturally relevant?things you can potentially get?jazzed about in 2015, because it’s always nice to have something to look forward to, even if it is Kim Kardashian’s?book of selifes.

The Most Beautiful Baby In The World Has Arrived

September 17th, 2014 By Megan Leitch

Did you find the air seemed a little sweeter this weekend?? Did the sun shine brighter, or the flowers seem prettier?? No, you were not feeling a flashback to that time in college you licked that LSD riddled stamp.? What caused the world to seem so much better was that the child of Mr. Perfect, Ryan Gosling, and that bitch Eva Mendes was born.

If you thought Brangelina gave birth to the celebrity messiah, you were seriously mistaken.? Brad lost his perfectness the minute he cheated on his wife with Angie.? Or maybe when he made Alexander? Ah, whatever.

Ryan Gosling Knocked Eva Mendes Up By Accident

July 25th, 2014 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

Well, I have to tip my hat to Eva Mendes. Not only did she land the most wanted dick in the world, Ryan Gosling, but when he seemed kind of over it, she pulled out the pregnancy card. Preach girl, you know how to play that shit!

New sources (probably Rachel McAdams) are saying that baby Gosling was actually conceived via goodbye fuck. Yes, that’s right, Ryan was done with Eva’s ass, but still decided to bareback it in her one last time and then BAM! Baby! Take notes, bitches, because this is how you keep a man like Ryan Gosling.

Ryan Gosling Just Keeps Breaking My Heart

July 12th, 2014 By Megan Leitch

According to a few news sources, the most perfect sensitive man in the world, Ryan Gosling, has decided to bless the world with?a tiny human made from his ideal DNA.? Since humans can’t just create babies on their own, this means he needed a female, so technically the baby is half Eva Mendes’.

Considering the last time I wrote about these two, it was because word on the street was that they had broken up (IF ONLY), I don’t know how much I believe this to be truth.

Eva Mendes Convinced That All Dogs Should Have Googly Eyes

March 27th, 2013 By Austin Walsh

In the latest issue of New York Magazine, Eva Mendes goes off the deep end advocating that celebrity dogs be afforded the same rights to privacy as celebrity children and have their faces blurred.

She wishes that tabloids would blur the faces of their dogs, Hugo (hers) and George [Gosling’s], in photos, like British papers do to kids’ faces. “I’ll go somewhere and they’ll be like, ?Hey, Hugo!’ and I’m like, ?How do you know Hugo’s name? That’s so creepy!’ “

Eva Mendes Talks To Her Dog In French, Which Is Fine Because They’ll Answer To Anything

February 8th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

Do you have a dog? Word to the wise – no-one actually cares. It’s your stupid, gristle-munching crap-factory and no-one else wants to deal with it outside of occasional petting of it when we have to visit your fur covered home that smells like dog’s teeth.

That’s because dogs are stupid. They’re impressively stupid. They walk into things, frighten themselves when flatulent and will forever be fooled by someone pretending to throw a ball for them. Dogs, in short, are idiots.

With that, someone ought to tell?Eva Mendes who is ten shades of thrilled that she talks to her dog in French and is bowled over that it knows what she’s on about. Or rather, it has no idea.

The Other Guys – Blu-ray Review

August 5th, 2012 By David Scarborough

It was only a matter of time until Mark Wahlberg embraced the fact that he was fast turning into bumbling platypus that Tinsletown pointed and laughed at.

Firstly, he had the indignity of dubbing himself ?Marky Mark,? affiliating himself with the hideously named Funky Bunch, starring in numerous so-so movies (under the guise of serious acting), and finally topping it off with a verbal joust with a resolute plant. Which, the plant won.

Its these previous overly po-faced performances that probably make him such a joy to watch throughout the latest Will Ferrell chuckle-fest, The Other Guys. That and the script, direction and all the other actors, obviously.