Ellie Goulding - HecklerSpray

Shocker: A Kid From 1D Was Able to Steal Ed Sheeran’s Girl

September 10th, 2014 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

Ed Sheeran: Voice of an angel, face of a hobbit, but still somehow able to briefly bag mega babe, Ellie Goulding. In case you missed it, as it was so short lived, last year, Ed Sheeran and Ellie Goulding were momentarily a very talented couple. However, it quickly ended and people began to speculate that it was because she cheated on him with one his pals from teen dream super group, One Direction.

Now, when I first heard about this I thought “No way. No way would a woman cheat on a lovable little pudgy ginger like Ed with an insanely sexy teen from One Direction who makes even grown ass women like myself melt. Impossible.” In case things are getting lost in internet translation: I’m being sarcastic.

Skrillex & Ellie Goulding’s Blossoming Romance Pre-Emptively Named Least Interesting Thing Of 2012

February 17th, 2012 By Michael Park

It might surprise you to learn that dubstep superstar Skrillex has managed to evade our detection up until now. Fans of uninspired, grimy rubbish need live in fear no longer. He finally matters to us!

Why do we suddenly care what the Greasy-Haired Prince of the Undercut is up to? Well, in case you haven’t heard he’s been making kissy-faces with Ellie Goulding of “having a jaw the size of a cruise-liner” fame.

There we go, there’s your jokes about their appearances. Did you enjoy them? No? Good.

Ellie Goulding’s Massive Jaw, Now Utterly Single

January 9th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

The Rocky Dennis of pop, Ellie Goulding, has really got something to be justifiably long-faced about – she’s only gone and split up with some boyfriend that we didn’t even know she had in the first place.?

Tragic news.

It transpires that her now-ex goes by the name of Greg James and, remarkably, he’s a Radio One DJ! Nope. Still never heard of him. We’re sure he’ll have a lot of fun playing Goulding’s records in the future when she’s bothering the hit parade.

Incredibly Long Unnecessary Review Of X Factor 2011, Episode 1

August 5th, 2012 By Sophie Hall

It has been 8 months now, since we all obligingly sat down with a couple of friends, some choice lunch meats, and self loathing, and watched Matt Cardle furiously leaking into his corduroy jeans.

Oh, and won X Factor 2010.

Some would say the healing process after viewing this will need a considerably longer time frame. Every daily tabloid feature for the entire of 2011 would possibly argue otherwise. Yes, that’s it. X Factor is certifiably, and unequivocally ?BACK?. Which is just as well, because the hysteria over rivals down at C5 Celebrity Big Brother completely died the moment Kerry Katona earnestly admitted to Brian Dowling that her ?life has been a rollercoaster?.