Is Lindsay Lohan a jewel thief? No. No she almost certainly is not. Seriously, have you seen Lindsay Lohan lately?
Honestly, if you can’t read the script to I Know Who Killed Me without realising that it’s terrible, or even go out in public without ending up rocking backwards and forwards like some kind of disturbingly foetal mad-eyed lunatic, you’re hardly going to be able to mastermind a jewel-theft, are you?
Nevertheless, jewels worth have been stolen from a Lindsay Lohan photoshoot. Lindsay’s not a suspect, though – unless she scared the jewels away with her scary voice and freckly knockers.

