Every wondered what it's like to have sex with Guy Ritchie? Us neither - in fact, we've spent much of our lives actively avoiding that exact thought.

But Madonna doesn't care. She's got an album coming out soon and she knows that nothing shifts CDs quite like intimate discussions of grubby sexual encounters with obnoxious mockneys, not matter how much they make your skin crawl.

For the record, Madonna says that Guy Ritchie is 'incredible' at sex - but before you get too excited, remember that some other things Madonna finds incredible include age-inappropriate leotards, scripts for poor erotic thrillers, Naomi Campbell's vagina, Andrew Lloyd-Webber musicals and made-up religions. It's hardly a group you'd want to be associated with, is it?