When Madonna chose Britney Spears to star in a video for her upcoming tour, she wanted Britney to utilise her best-known talent.
So from that we can assume that Britney Spears will be singing in Madonna's video, right? Not quite. Dancing? Close, but no cigar.
Instead, Madonna's video requires Britney Spears to smash up the inside of an elevator while screaming her lungs out like some sort of crazy, red-eyed bitch from hell.
It's a stretch, we know, but somehow we think Britney Spears will be able to pull it off. We've seen Crossroads, after all, so we know what a versatile actor she can be when she's essentially limited to playing herself.
Mathematics exams, for example. Or being subjected to a slideshow of holiday snaps. Or wading through the 746,983 comments along the lines of ‘OMG, OMG, why r u such haters, Pete Doherty is a legend, I luv u Pete !!!!!!!1111′ that hecklerspray receives every single day.
Nothing, though, matches the sheer soul-crippling nightmare you’re about to see. Footage has only just been released of a peculiar event in 1999, in which magazine writer Nicholas White popped out of his high-storey New York office for a cigarette. He took the elevator. It stopped. And he was stuck.
For forty hours.
Want to see that condensed into three minutes? Hell – we don’t care if you do or not. Here it is anyway.
When Madonna chose Britney Spears to star in a video for her upcoming tour, she wanted Britney to utilise her best-known talent.
