HecklerSpray

Grown Up Gossip & Internet Villainy

Mila Kunis May Be In 50 Shades Of Grey And That’s Alright With Me

January 30th, 2013 By Chris Starr

Mila Kunis

Guys, I have great news! Not since, well, ever has someone been able to present such absolutely, uneqivocally awesome news to the world. It’s like how I imagine the disciples who managed to announce Jesus’ arrival felt, except ten times better because this has a modicum of truth to it.

Guys, Mila Kunis might be in 50 Shades of Grey.

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Soulless Kristen Stewart is actually capable of loving two men

August 1st, 2012 By Chris Starr

Kristen Stewart goes for a walk after apologising to Robert Pattinson

Who knew that this face was capable of loving any one man, never mind two? Kristen Stewart is a massive whore, it seems, enraging Twihards everywhere (including Youtube user Nuttymadam, who is, well, a nutty madam). Not content with sleeping with quiffed strong, silent dreamboat Robert Pattinson, Stewart decided she needed to also get friendly with director Rupert Sanders.

Of course, no good comes from cheating. But there’s a small glimmer of hope to be found in the sordid situation. It turns out that Kristen Stewart isn’t in fact a soulless, smile-free dummy whose job it is to brood and look depressed on celluloid and red carpets. She’s someone capable of romantic feelings – she has so many feelings that she couldn’t just share them with one person! (Which is in itself a little scuzzy, but frankly we didn’t know she had it in her so it’s impressive nonetheless.)

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