Articles tagged with: Eight Months
Daniel Radcliffe’s Penis Pushed Harry Potter Back Eight Months
Daniel Radcliffe may well be the face of Harry Potter, but he's already made great headway towards getting away from being pigeonholed. The way he went about this was to go on stage and get his penis out. It's a classic technique, and one we've surely all practiced at some point in our lives. If we have the necessary equipment, of course. But what happens when you're pottering about (PUN!) getting your bits out on stage around the same time that the new chapter in a kids film, in which you star, is coming out? Well, kids, Harry Potter 6 gets pushed back eight months, if the wild, rampant and ker-azy speculation is to be believed. Yes kids - Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince isn't coming out because of Daniel Radcliffe's penis. That is one of the greatest sentences we've ever had to write, even if it isn't actually definitely true.
Daniel Radcliffe may well be the face of Harry Potter, but he's already made great headway towards getting away from being pigeonholed. The way he went about this was to go on stage and get his penis out. It's a classic technique, and one we've surely all practiced at some point in our lives. If we have the necessary equipment, of course. But what happens when you're pottering about (PUN!) getting your bits out on stage around the same time that the new chapter in a kids film, in which you star, is coming out? Well, kids, Harry Potter 6 gets pushed back eight months, if the wild, rampant and ker-azy speculation is to be believed. Yes kids - Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince isn't coming out because of Daniel Radcliffe's penis. That is one of the greatest sentences we've ever had to write, even if it isn't actually definitely true.
Harry Potter and the Legions of Disappointed Idiots
If you're an adult that lists the Harry Potter series of books as one of your favourites then you likely need to be shot. In the face. If you're an adult that lists the Harry Potter series of films as one of your favourites then you need to be fired. From a cannon. Into the sun. Twice. Needless to say, the idiots that do like this garbage - that's 'kids' and the aforementioned persons that need to be killed in excessive fashions - will be upset to learn that the newest film, Harry Potter and the Simple Premise Drawn Out For Far Too Long, Thus Making Billions of Dollars, has been pushed back by eight months. Why? Technical problems? Realising it's crap? No - to make sure it comes out in the summer when Warner Bros don't have much else to bring out. In other words: to make more money. What a lovely, cynical, money-grabbing world we do live in. It makes us feel all gooey inside.
If you're an adult that lists the Harry Potter series of books as one of your favourites then you likely need to be shot. In the face. If you're an adult that lists the Harry Potter series of films as one of your favourites then you need to be fired. From a cannon. Into the sun. Twice. Needless to say, the idiots that do like this garbage - that's 'kids' and the aforementioned persons that need to be killed in excessive fashions - will be upset to learn that the newest film, Harry Potter and the Simple Premise Drawn Out For Far Too Long, Thus Making Billions of Dollars, has been pushed back by eight months. Why? Technical problems? Realising it's crap? No - to make sure it comes out in the summer when Warner Bros don't have much else to bring out. In other words: to make more money. What a lovely, cynical, money-grabbing world we do live in. It makes us feel all gooey inside.
Brace Yourselves: Foxy Brown’s Out Of Jail
We're not joking. Lock your doors, strap down your children and only go to sleep if you're wearing full body armour - Foxy Brown is out of jail. On Friday afternoon Foxy Brown was finally set free from Riker's Island jail, where she'd been serving time for probation violation stemming from a fight with some manicure workers. And, although the world has changed drastically in the eight months since she was first imprisoned, Foxy Brown has gone all out to prove that she's changed even more. In fact, Foxy Brown has publicly stated that she believes God put her in jail for a reason. Which is actually true - it's just that the reason happened to be that Foxy Brown is a mental lunatic who couldn't be more violent if you cross-bred her with a wasp.
We're not joking. Lock your doors, strap down your children and only go to sleep if you're wearing full body armour - Foxy Brown is out of jail. On Friday afternoon Foxy Brown was finally set free from Riker's Island jail, where she'd been serving time for probation violation stemming from a fight with some manicure workers. And, although the world has changed drastically in the eight months since she was first imprisoned, Foxy Brown has gone all out to prove that she's changed even more. In fact, Foxy Brown has publicly stated that she believes God put her in jail for a reason. Which is actually true - it's just that the reason happened to be that Foxy Brown is a mental lunatic who couldn't be more violent if you cross-bred her with a wasp.
