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DVD

Kevin Federline Fitness DVD Coming To Ruin Your 2009

by hecklerspray staff

From DIETPIXIE – If you thought the release of the worst single ever, Popozao, was the lowest point in Kevin Federline’s ‘career’– think again.

That’s because Britney Spears’ ex-husband plans to release a fitness DVD.

You see, K-Fed does not want to rely on the $20,000 a month he gets from Britney Spears to help him bring up their two kids Jayden James, 21 months, and two-year-old Sean Preston, who he was given full custody of earlier this month.

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DVD Reviews: The Kite Runner

by hecklerspray staff

Don’t let the bookworm prestige of the title or the two-hour plus running time dissuade you from The Kite Runner.

It’s one of those rare ‘issue’ films that remains an enticing and emotionally electrifying viewing experience that may restore your faith in cinema after the distracting memory left by that turgid Indiana Jones encounter you had a few weeks back.

The story commences in 2000 San Francisco, where a young Afghan writer receives a mysterious phone call from someone in Pakistan telling him that he has a chance to redeem himself.

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Win A Big Load Of Curb Your Enthusiasm Stuff RIGHT NOW

by Stuart Heritage

We love Curb Your Enthusiasm. of course we do. It’s Curb Your Enthusiasm, for god’s sake. People who don’t love it are weird.

And with the back-to-its-best sixth season of Curb Your Enthusiasm hitting these shores on June 9, we thought it might be time to give you the chance to win a Curb Your Enthusiasm prize so incredible that it’s all we can do not to fake a new identity and give the prize to ourselves. Courtesy of HBO video, you can win a kickass Curb Your Enthusiasm goody bag containing:

* A Curb Your Enthusiasm season six boxset,

* A CYE book,

* Two CYE mugs,

* A CYE ‘Sample Abuser’ T-shirt

And if you don’t win that, there’s a runner-up prize of a season six boxset as well. And all you have to do to win these prizes is to answer the following question:

Larry David’s filming a movie right now. Who’s the director?

Email your answers – with the subject line ‘Woody Allen competition’ – to hello@hecklerspray.com as soon as you can along with your name and address, and we’ll pick winners at random by the end of the week. UK readers only, please. Good luck.

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DVD Review: Freebird

by hecklerspray staff

Any film that has the balls to cast the usually well-versed and impeccably attired Peter Bowles as a lumbering, foul-mouthed, pot-smoking, cockneyfied old timer deserves some credit.

Unfortunately he’s only in it for the first five or so minutes (he passes out amid a mist of intoxicating weed), and it’s therefore left for the younger likes of Phil Daniels, (ace in Quadrophenia) Gary Stretch (Dead Man’s Shoes) and co to carry the film to its mortal doom.

Freebird is a road movie of sorts that wants to be the British comedy answer to Dennis Hopper’s Easy Rider but doesn’t have the inspiration, charm or guts to carry any fleeting comparison to that vintage biker film.

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Win The Kite Runner On DVD Right Now

by Stuart Heritage

Time for another one of our super soaraway competitions – and this time you can win The Kite Runner on DVD.

Oh, you know, The Kite Runner – the story of Amir, a well-to-do boy from the Wazir Akbar Khan district of Kabul, who is tormented by the guilt of abandoning his friend Hassan, the son of his father’s Hazara servant. It was Oscar nominated and directed by the man behind the new Bond movie. We called The Kite Runner “the star on top of the tree,” whatever that means. And we’ve got two copies to give away to you right now.

To win a copy of The Kite Runner on DVD, all you need to do is answer this question:

What’s the Japanese name for a traditional six-sided fighting kite?

Email your answers – with the subject line ‘Rokkaku Dako Competition’ – to hello@hecklerspray.comas soon as you can along with your name and address, and we’ll pick two winners at random by the end of the week. UK readers only, please. Good luck.

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Win The Jim Jarmusch Collection Vol 1 DVD Boxset Now

by Stuart Heritage

Readers, we know some of out competition prizes have blown in the past. Any fool with a promotional I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry apron from us knows that.

But this time we promise that we’ve got a good’un on our hands. Indie moviemaker extraordinaire Jim Jarmusch has a DVD boxset – inventively titled The Jim Jarmusch Collection Vol 1 – coming out soon, and we’ve got three copies to give away. Comprising Permanent Vacation, Stranger Than Paradise and the still-unbeatable Down By Law, The Jim Jarmusch Collection Vol 1 is basically the best rainy Sunday ever in box form.

To win The Jim Jarmusch Collection Vol 1, all you need to do is answer this question:

Which gravel-voiced singer stars in Down By Law?

Email your answers – with the subject line ‘Tom Waits Competition’ – to hello@hecklerspray.com as soon as you can along with your name and address, and we’ll pick three winners at random by the end of the week. UK readers only, please. Good luck.

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DVD Review: 30 Days Of Night

by hecklerspray staff

Just as Samuel L Jackson could star in the biggest box office turd of all time and still come out clean on the other side, so vampire movies can be terminally cack and still stake a place in the hearts of cinemagoers.

A case in point is the Blade trilogy that people liked so much we got a TV series full of lunatic plotlines and enough fake fangs to restock the NHS. Heck, even John Carpenter’s Vampires managed two sequels and that had James Woods AND Daniel Baldwin.

They’re not all bad though, and while the prospect of a new bloodsucker flick starring master of the middle distance stare Josh Hartnett may not fill your soul with glee, we have some shocking news for you. 30 Days Of Night is actually not that bad.

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DVD Review – Jimmy Carr: Comedian

by Chris Laverty

Do not buy this DVD if you do not like Jimmy Carr.

That is the swiftest way we can get you away from here and back to rearranging your underwear draw. Of course, such a statement raises two serious concerns: why would anyone who does not like Jimmy Carr want to buy his new stand-up DVD in the first place, and does anyone even bother with an underwear draw these days, let alone rearrange it?

(Re. the first question: Jimmy Carr: Comedian could be gift or a promotional freebie. You might have inadvertently shoplifted the thing by accident.)

So, what you really want to know is will you, the consummate Jimmy Carr hater, the guy who moans every time he appears on some panel show – every time you ever turn on the TV – does a cameo in Two-Point Four Weddings And A Bit Part For Martin Freeman or gets interviewed in a Sunday supplement, will you change your mind about this suited, booted shoulderless man and his sardonic, blisteringly fast wordplay wit just on the basis of seeing this DVD alone? Nope.

(To the second question: try arranging your pants in order of tone and the socks into categories, say dress and sports. If you are a girl and wear girly things, consult a publication with Jennifer Lopez or Anne Hathaway on the cover.)

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Win A Bunch Of Channel 4 DVDs With Fingers On Buzzers

by Stuart Heritage

Remember last year when there was that sudden craze for stocking-filler interactive DVD games that you played once on Christmas day and then left to go dusty on a shelf?

Well, they’re bound to be back this year – but if any of you have any sense you should avoid them all and head straight for Fingers On Buzzers, the new interactive DVD game that comes with a set of Buzz-style buzzers. Gloriously easy to set up and impressively easy to play – and that’s coming from people who haven’t fully grasped the concept of zips yet – Fingers On Buzzers does the impossible and actually makes interactive DVD games fun. We know, we were staggered too.

Anyway, to mark the release of Fingers On Buzzers, we’ve been given a giant stack of Channel 4 DVDs to give one lucky reader. In total one of you will win a stack of DVDs including Shameless 4, Peep Show 4, Skins, Jimmy Carr Comedian, Deal or No Deal Family Challenge, Fingers On Buzzers, Modern Toss and Fonejacker, and answer the following question:

Who was the 14th Duke Of Somerset?

Email your answers, along with your name and address to hello@hecklerspray.com with the subject heading ‘Algernon St Maur quiz’ and one lucky winner will be picked at random on Friday evening. UK readers only again, we’re afraid. Good luck!

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