A lot of things could be said about Paris Hilton. For instance, you could say she's named after the only city filthier than any underpants she's been wearing for more than three hours. Also you could say she has a lazy eye.
What you can't say about Paris Hilton, however, is that she cares in the least about alcoholic Indian elephants. She doesn't care about those at all. It doesn't matter to her that in that part of India, drunken elephants account for over 3% of pachyderm fatalities. It also doesn't matter to her that night-time elephant drinking increases tusky next-day workplace tardiness exponentially. Just on the morning shifts.
This incredible display of callousness proves once and for all that the post-jail Paris is just as shallow and selfish as her pre-prison self. Or perhaps it just proves nobody ever told her Indian elephants really like getting sloshed and tipping over electric poles. Whatever the case, the only statement her camp has made about India's very real problem is that she never made a statement about it.
