dragon's den - HecklerSpray

Dragon’s Den: With Royal Approval

August 5th, 2012 By Jacki Evans

This week?s Dragons Den came with the royal seal of approval. Except that it didn't. It came with a man who?d sent a board game to the Queen, got a letter of thanks, and then got a bit confused and thought this meant she loved him. And that was just one of the interludes. Actual royalty? And it's not even deemed worthy of a full pitch? What other wonders can the show possibly hold that will match that?

The answer, strangely enough, was shit in a bag. Quite literally. A woman called Kate Castle came into the den with a camping stool with a hole in it, shoved a bin bag through said hole, and then told the Dragons that she'd invented a portable toilet. Peter didn't seem particularly impressed, but that was no matter.

For Kate only had eyes for Theo.

Dragon’s Den: It’s Not X Factor (But Still Better Than Big Brother)

August 5th, 2012 By Jacki Evans

This weekend may have been the weekend that all the reality shows returned all at once, but it wasn?t all crazy excitement and Gary Barlow. No, Dragon?s Den was still plodding along on a Sunday night, parading a different class of idiot in front of us. Idiots who think they can invent and do business, rather than sing.

Except for one strange Mexican lady, but we?ll get to her later.

First into the Den this week was a man in a bow-tie who thought he had the best invention ever. In actual fact, he had a box which blows balls at your face. we're pretty sure it was in Noel?s House Party in the mid 90s, throwing money at celebrities, so a load of the Dragons ran away from it because it's not original. Which is a bit ridiculous, since he called his company Unique Ideas UK Ltd. That box isn't unique. It used to share a stage with Mr Blobby back in the early 90s.

Dragon’s Den: More Rubbish Than Usual

August 5th, 2012 By Jacki Evans

This week on Dragon?s Den, it was rubbish ideas week. More rubbish than usual, that is. The most exciting idea was a way to solve premature fence failure, which sadly, isn't nearly as dirty as it sounds. hecklerspray just heard ?premature? and got all excited. That?ll teach us.

Before we got to the premature boys though, we had to plough through a whole load of crap. Which started alarmingly literally, with a doggie litter box. The business owners tried to pretend it was just about doggie wazz, but we all know that you'd come down in the morning to find a whacking great log in it. But that's okay, because it comes with machine washable grass!

Which doesn't make it sound any more appealing.

Dragon’s Den: We’ve Just Remembered To Pay Attention

August 5th, 2012 By Jacki Evans

Apparently a new series of Dragon?s Den started last week. hecklerspray wasn?t paying attention though, so whilst the rest of the country was staring in horror at new Dragon Hilary Devey?s face and wondering who she stole it from, we were completely oblivious.

But it's ok, because we've caught up now and her face is still really, really weird. She looks a bit like a corpse in a wig. And she sounds like Skeletor after 30 years of smoking 40 a day. We like her already.

It seems she's a little bit stingy though. We were helpfully informed at the start of the show that she was yet to invest a single pound, so we spent all of the show wondering if she's give anyone any cash. Although by ?all of the show? we clearly mean ?about 30 seconds?. Anyway, let's see what the idiotic public wanted money for this week, shall we?

Duncan Bannatyne Puts ?50,000 Bounty On Man Through Twitter

August 2nd, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

We all know that the folks of Dragon’s Den are a ruthless bunch, but did you know they were dead-hearted enough to put bounties on people, asking for their arms to be broken? You may think this is the stuff of fantasy, but it really just happened.

See, Duncan Bannatyne – a man who has had a funny relationship with twitter – has tweeted a bounty on someone.

Basically, for a quick job, you can pocket ?50,000. All Duncan wants you to do in return is break someone’s arms. Don’t believe us? Screengrab over the jump.