Dr Pepper Gets A Full-On Guns N’ Roses Strop Attack Axl Rose always keeps his promises - even promises that take about 20 years which nobody really cares about any more. And if a tubby ginger hermit like Axl Rose can keep his promises, then he damn well expects a fizzy drinks company like Dr Pepper to as well. You'll remember that Dr Pepper promised everyone in America a free drink if Guns N' Roses released Chinese Democracy this year. Well, Guns N' Roses did release Chinese Democracy this year but, thanks to a website snafu, hardly anyone got their free Dr Pepper. And so Guns N' Roses have literally got their lawyer to demand that Dr Pepper gives everyone their free drink regardless of the cost. It might seem like a heavyhanded gesture, but that's nothing - Axl Rose is so furious about this mix-up that he's decided to record a brand new album to deliberately address what he sees as Dr Pepper's shoddy customer service. Expected release date - the year four hundred billion AD.

Chinese Democracy: Axl Rose Bribed With Fizzy Goodness

Axl Rose has been working on Guns N' Roses album Chinese Democracy for 14 years now, and in the absence of a release date, the big guns have been brought out.

OK, not really the big guns as such. The fizzy syrup that rots your teeth and tastes a bit like metal. Lots and lots of the fizzy syrup that rots your teeth and tastes a bit like metal. That instead of the big guns.

Fizzy drink company Dr Pepper has promised a free can of Dr Pepper to everyone in America if Guns N' Roses release Chinese Democracy in 2008. What people do with it is up to them - they can either immerse themselves in the exhilarating complex effervescence of Dr Pepper or pound the unopened can against their temple until they're unconscious because they'd rather suffer blunt force trauma than hear what a letdown Chinese Democracy is.