Former Paula Abdul backing singer and Earth Wind & Fire dancer, Michael Jackson, has passed away last night in a flurry of controversy, mainly because “he didn’t seem the sort to just die like that, did he?”
The former singer, who of course had minor R&B hits such as ‘Let’s Get Serious’ and ‘Raspberry Beret’, died while in the arms of his rumoured lover, Doctor Conrad Murray who, at the time of press, has asked for his ‘privacy to be respected at this time of huge sadness and mountainous loss’.
Of course, with that, we went snooping through his bins and stuck a dictaphone in his face so we could get the words “respect my privacy please” and “mountainous loss”.