Since John and George died, there’s been something of a tussle over who can be the funniest remaining Beatle. Paul McCartney is just too wacky to be properly funny, so that means, by default, Ringo gets the crown, right?
Well, sadly for Ringo, he seems to be suffering from an onset on dementia.
Of course, our Ring’ became something of a laughing stock when he warned us all with ‘peace and love’ not to send him any more gifts (how can anyone top those paintings Marge Simpson did of him?). Then he went and vaguely slagged off Liverpool. He’s priceless isn’t he? Well, now he’s slagging Paul McCartney off. Next, we assume he’ll be pissing on Lennon’s grave.
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Ah! Ringo Starr! Currently the fourth most intelligent Beatle. Yes. We realise two of them are dead. Even the ghost of Lennon wouldn’t be so daft as to warn people with peace and love about sending him shit to the afterlife.
Yet this isn’t a bad thing. It’s because Ringo Starr is so insultingly stupid that he’s so great. In The Beatles Anthology series, all the best one-liners were his. He swore like nobody’s business and showed off a variety of spectacularly dismal waistcoats and mullets. What a guy!
However, we would like to see his house knocked down please because he’s an ungrateful swine.
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If you care deeply about the fate of houses that skinny dead women used to live in, then this is the story for you.
The family home of The Carpenters is going to be demolished because the current owner is sick of weird Carpenters fans hanging around all the time, and the fight is on to save the important memorial that one quite dull band used to live in for a while until one of them died.
Will the campaign to save The Carpenters house from demolition be successful? More importantly, can you really bring yourself to be even slightly bothered about whether a sodding house gets knocked down or not?
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