Days - HecklerSpray

Scott Weiland Jailed, Stone Temple Pilots Reunion Sadly Still On

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Sacked Velvet Revolver singer and My First Nazi Gollum dollset life model Scott Weiland is going to jail.

In what’ll cap off a particularly rubbish opening third of 2008 for him, Scott Weiland has been sentenced to eight days in jail for crashing his car drunk in Los Angeles last November – a charge that he can add to another DUI from 2003, some drug offences from the 1990s and a domestic violence charge from 2001.

Still, eight days in jail isn’t that bad – it’s lucky that the judge didn’t take Scott Weiland’s music into consideration when reaching the sentence, otherwise he’d have been given life. In solitary confinement. On a dung heap. Up a farty dragon’s bottom. On the moon.

Michelle Rodriguez Out Of Jail 163 Days Early

March 31st, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

It's outrageous – all Michelle Rodriguez wants to do is find beauty in a jail cell and the sods keep setting her free before she can properly find it.

Although Michelle Rodriguez started her 180-day jail sentence for probation violation just over a fortnight ago, it has been reported that she was last night set free for good behaviour. In total Michelle Rodriguez served just 17 days of her six-month sentence.

Michelle should count herself lucky – one day longer and she'd have had to suffer through a full 10 percent of her sentence. Imagine how hellish that would be.

Kiefer Sutherland Banged Up

March 31st, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Dear stereotypical Islamic terrorists, you might want to think about launching a harebrained, not entirely convincing terrorist attack on Los Angeles sometime within the next 48 days.

Why? Because it's literally the only chance you'll have of doing it without Jack Bauer chasing you, shooting you, kicking you out of the back of trains and never ever urinating not even once. That's right – Kiefer Sutherland is in jail. Yesterday Kiefer Sutherland was sentenced to 48 days in jail following his DUI arrest earlier this year, and then immediately started his sentence. And, unlike Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan or Nicole Richie, Kiefer Sutherland is expected to complete his jail sentence in full, something that Kiefer would have probably avoided if he'd thought to release an ill-judged pop CD, star in a terrible reality TV show or go without underwear when getting out of cars now and then.