We don’t admit to being cool and if for some reason you are devoted to our every word, then er… we’ll send you a special sticker or something to show you some loyalty.

Here at hecklerspray towers, we love everyone. Especially those who occasionally send us free things. Random presents are always appreciated, be it boxes of crisps or half-drunk bottles of wine.

One thing we don’t like is when big artists treat everyone else like dog doo. You may be a multi-platinum superstar, but nothing angers us more when someone pushes in front of us at the pub. That is unless you’re buying something for us. Even still, we prefer artists who firstly make great music and wouldn’t mind talking to us before/after a gig. We think David E Sugar would.