Posts tagged as:

Dancing With The Stars

Sarah Palin Wins Hearts And Minds By Killing Things And Forcing Her Daughter To Dance

by Mof Gimmers

Look into Sarah Palin’s eyes. What do you see? Your own reflection probably, because she wears glasses. However, hoik those specs clean off her head and you’ll see a faint glimpse of life in those cold, dead eyes. That’s because Palin is a cold-blooded killer. Now, we’re not suggesting that Palin went postal over the [...]

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Badvertising: A Situation Situated Between Bristol Palin And The Situation

by Kris Silver

Poor old Bristol Palin, she’s got a shotgun wielding nutcase of a mother, had a child with a man who has neck so red that it can’t be seen by the naked eye and, unbelievably, she failed to win some shoddy yank spin-off of Strictly Come Dancing. In what can only be seen as an [...]

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Bristol Palin Doesn’t Win Dancing With The Stars Because Everyone Hates Her Mother

by Mof Gimmers

There’s been mutterings over the pond that Dancing With The Stars has been a bit skewed this year. Why? Well, Bristol ‘My Mom Is Sarah Palin And I Have A Hilarious Ex Boyfriend’ Palin found herself in the final three, despite having the dancing prowess of a kitchen work surface. It seems that the Tea [...]

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Pamela Anderson Goes To Israel To Star In Talent Show While Mouthing Words About Nasty Fur Trade

by Mof Gimmers

If Pamela Anderson says something is horrifying, then you’re advised to believe her. Why? Well, here we have a woman who has had sex with some of the ugliest humans alive (Kid Rock, Tommy Lee and Brett Michaels) and worked for a prolonged period with David Hasselhoff. And so, when she’s not appearing in panto [...]

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Michael Bolton Wants Bruno Tonioli Head On A Stick For Dancing With The Stars Comments

by Mof Gimmers

Michael Bolton once murdered some soul classics. Have you heard the abject horror of his version of ‘When A Man Loves A Woman’? Have you endured his butchering of Sitting On The Dock Of The Bay? Well, it seems that, apart from being America’s answer to Simply Red (which effectively means making the most godawful [...]

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Dancing With The Stars Shows That Americans Want David Hasselhoff To Die

by Mof Gimmers

People who were famous in the ’80s thrive on knowing that, despite falling out of favour with various television and record company executives, their hardcore fanbase still love them. These fans are what stop them from rigging a hose up to the exhaust and ending this cruel life. But what happens when those fans suddenly [...]

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Want To See Bristol Palin Cantering Like A Sick Horse On Dancing With The Stars?

by Mof Gimmers

Once upon a time, Britain looked to the Royal Family with distrust because they were always distant and remote. Then, they appeared on our TVs in It’s A Royal Knock-Out! and we all realised that their being away from us was a huge blessing. Now, America is faced with the same feeling after watching Sarah [...]

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Dancing With The Stars: David Hasselhoff’s Awful Sex Vehicle

by Stuart Heritage

This year’s Dancing With The Stars will feature the likes of Bristol Palin, The Situation and Michael Bolton.

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Dancing With The Stars Line-Up: A Harrowing Cheese Dream

by Stuart Heritage

Hey, everyone, Dancing With The Stars is back! No, wait, don’t leave, that’s good news. No, really, it is.

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Nicole Scherzinger Wins Dancing With The Stars: Surprise!

by Stuart Heritage

When this year’s Dancing With The Stars began, and you looked at all the contestants, who did you think would win?

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