Stephen Fry is the Dad we wished we all had here at Hecklerspray, mainly because he’s less drinky-drinky-touchy-feely than our real Dads, but also because he’s so loveable and he loves technology.

Fry has always showcased his love for technology and yesterday conducted the first ever newspaper interview via twitter, in which he used the popular but ultimately pointless and constantly broken social network to talk to the only man in the UK with a name more ridiculous than (the sparkly new editor of Hecklerspray) Mof Gimmers. The impossibly smug Johann Hari.

Johann the man seemed to be hoping to get a few followers out of this as without following him it just looked like Stephen Fry had had a bit of a breakdown and decided the best way to advertise this to the world was starting to interview himself live on the internet, in a way that was too clever for us to really make fun of. Think Mel Gibson’s phone rants mixed with the Times crossword.

Hari also seemed to spend a bit too long asking Stephen Fry about his appearance and aspects of his love life. A ‘proper’ journalist would tell you that this is because, as a sufferer of manic-depression, Fry’s image of himself appears to be horribly distorted, to the point where he seems to look in the mirror and sees a man with Michael Jackson’s face and Rick Waller’s body staring back at him.

However, after much discussion within the not-so-serious confines of the Hecklerspray office, it was obvious that the reason for all the personal questions was because Hari fancies being the yoghurt pot to Fry’s spoon (apologies if that’s put you off your lunch, especially once you know what Hari looks like).

The self described, “European Social Democrat,” who managed to call the Dalai Lama a bitch, then proceeded to name drop Dolly Parton and Busted during the pre-amble, couldn’t be more of a smug faced goon if he tried.

Sorry if I’ve now ruined yoghurt for you, blame Johann.

10 - Because nothing has ever happened on the internet that Michael Cera didn’t want a piece of…

9 - In case you’ve yet to see it, here’s Fearne Cotton at the BAFTAs dressed like a baddie from The Dark Crystal - Popsugar

8 - Five potential new Lara Crofts that aren’t Megan Fox – Wired

7 - Some ridiculous moral panics for you – Cracked

6 – The Dalai Lama is on Twitter. Oh, look surprised – Readwriteweb

5 - Are you going to kill yourself because you’re poor? You are, aren’t you - TIME

4 – Easily the most beautiful unpublished children’s book we’ve ever seen – Flickr

3 - BACON EXPLOSION! – I Am Bored

2 – Ten delicious sausages - Askmen

1 – Something hilarious about Jason Mraz. Consider this a primer for the next story – Popjustice

That Dalai Lama and Robert Smith are a lot alike. More alike than you probably appreciate.

The Dalai Lama and Robert Smith both have their own websites, both find an umbrella necessary during monsoon season, both say “let’s go to bed” when they’re sleepy, and both of them are distancing themselves from Sharon Stone.

So, the Sharon Stone thing might be true for the Dalai Lama, but we’d wager Robert Smith would do the same, given the chance.

We’d all do the same, given the chance.

The Dalai Lama is a wise leader, both politically and spiritually, and being the reincarnation of Buddhist masters comes with great responsibility, and right now that responsibility is to stop messing around and finally de-skankify Buddhism.

We’ve all seen it coming, really. After associating with Hollywood in even the mildest degree, there can’t help but be a nasty skanky build-up in one’s religion. So, the Dalai Lama is going for the jugular and starting with the mother of all skanks: Sharon Stone.

You already know, but just to fill in our mother who doesn’t get to read hecklerspray as often as most mothers do, the whole Sharon Stone brouhaha derives from when last month at the Cannes Film Festival, when Sharon Stone took it upon herself to declare that the earthquake in China that killed 70,000 people may be karmic punishment for their treatment of Tibet. In the same interview, Sharon Stone had also squawked that the Dalai Lama and her are grand old friends.

But the Dalai Lama? Yeah, he’s not so sure about all that jazz. At a recent press conference in Sydney, the Dalai Lama seemed to delicately distance himself from his supposed BFF. He said:

“…yes, I’ve met that lady. Of course from a Buddhist viewpoint, every event is karma. Tragedy in Tibet, tragedy in Burma (Myanmar), tragedy in China, all this is karmic … but her particular sort of comment — that I don’t know.”

Our special Dalai Lama translation correspondence course tells us that the Dalai Lama’s statement in pseudo-street terms means, “get away from me, you psycho beast, and take your backasswards nonsense ideas with you”.

Maybe being banned from China and having the Dalai Lama back away from Sharon Stone slowly, cautiously, like a man dipped in steak juice backing away from a deranged panther, is karma’s way of punishing Sharon Stone for, um, well everything, actually. We’ll let you choose which reason is your particular favorite.