Articles tagged with: crying
Never let it be said we are anything but balanced, fair and righteous here at hecklerspray - we will always cover things from every angle available to us. Which is why we're now going to talk about the latest TV appearance by Peter Andre, where he gets all boo-hooey and says he's all about his kids and stuff, and then completely fails to see the connection between apologising for his life in the spotlight then announcing he has a new reality show currently filming. What a tool. See? We're not just mean to Katie Price. Though she is a giganto-titted monstrosity of Lovecraftian proportions.
We're red-blooded men, so if there's one thing we like more than watching strangers have sex, it's watching strangers have sex and then cry. Therefore, we've decided to crown Kim Kardashian as our favourite girl in the whole wide world. Following that tape she made where she had loads of sex with that bloke, Kim Kardashian has apparently been sobbing her eyes out because she was voted off Dancing With The Stars this week. True, that means there's a full 18-month gap between Kim Kardashian having sex and Kim Kardashian crying, but we have to take what we can get. Anyway, the point is that Kim Kardashian was sad to be voted off Dancing With The Stars last night. But on the plus side, Kim can use this new free time to really try and work on closing that gap between the sex and the crying, maybe getting it down to a week or a good night's sleep.
Christie Brinkley has got divorced so many times that you'd expect her to see them through with the grim dead-eyed precision of an abattoir worker taking out livestock.
Shows what we know, huh? In fact, Christie Brinkley has turned up at the courthouse on the first day of her divorce trial looking so weepy and emotionally frazzled that we were half expecting her to literally tear her own heart out of her chest as a graphic demonstration of what her cheating husband did to her.
Christie Brinkley was so upset, she says, because she really didn't want her divorce to reach a courtroom. We can see her point - it must be galling to have to go through a painful experience like a divorce in public. Especially when, like Christie Brinkley, you're the one who doggedly stipulated that the trial had to be conducted in public in the first place. We're welling up just thinking about it.
The image of a popular hip hop star is generally of a 'hard' guy spittin' lyrics, wearing gorgeous golden jewelry, carrying a gun in one hand and a stolen baby in the other. A far cry from the one we're about to tell you. Now we'll be the first to admit we don't keep up on the day to day soap opera that is rap music. Last we heard Young MC had an evil twin or something, Andre 3000 came back from the dead and Erica Kane was about to cut an album. Also the fellow known as Young Buck got kicked out of 50 Cent's thingy called G-Unit. We've got a link to a wonderful place on the next page wherein an audio recording of a phone conversation Young Buck had with 50 begging for reentry into the group can be heard. The guy even cries in it.
Since this year's Oscars were made of about 85% retrospective clips, it meant that viewers were forced to watch every last self-congratulatory moment from Oscar history on Sunday.
Except one - thanks to a heartbreaking oversight, Vassilis Fotopoulos' speech after winning the Best Art Direction Oscar for Zorba The Greek in 1964 was cruelly omitted from the proceedings.
Oh, and everything Whoopi Goldberg ever did. Despite winning an Oscar - and being the Oscars host on four separate occasions between 1994 and 2001 - there was no sign of Whoopi Goldberg anywhere in all the endless montages on Sunday. And that made Whoopi Goldberg cry. On TV. Video after the jump.
As much as Christmas is about baby Jesus and playing your new Nintendo Wii until you can't bend your arm any more, it's also about something more - watching billionaires cry about wizards and stuff.
At some point between Christmas and the new year, there's going to be an ITV documentary broadcast entitled JK Rowling ... A Year in the Life, all about Harry Potter creator JK Rowling and her adventures completing Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows. But the documentary also shows what JK Rowling gets up to in her spare time which - in between posing for giant statues of herself made from one giant diamond and offering the poor £50 to spend a week as JK's Dancing Monkey Slave - mainly involves going to places where she used to live and crying a lot.
