Cristiano Ronaldo is a nice bloke isn’t he? He can do six-hundred step-overs, give a cheeky wink, impregnate a penniless woman and then come up with the astonishing name of Cristiano Ronaldo for it (regardless of whether it was going to be a boy or a girl) without breaking sweat. What a guy!
What’s all this about penniless? Yep. C-Ron (pronounced ‘ARGH!’) has thrown a lifeline to a good, honest, poverty-stricken girl and not, as most are implying, used his incredible wealth and footballishness to convince a woman to slide between his sheets. And you want to hear his chat-up line that he wooed her with! Read More >>>
You can tell that Cristiano Ronaldo will be a good father to his three-week-old son. It’s perfectly obvious.
You can tell because he’s rich. You can tell because he has kindly eyes. You can tell because, um, he’s gone on holiday with a Russian model and left the baby with its nan. Alright, forget that last bit. The point is that fatherhood is bound to change Cristiano Ronaldo’s personality entirely. Now that he’s responsible for a young life, Cristiano Ronaldo is bound to become less self-obsessed, less egotistical, less…
What’s that? Cristiano Ronaldo has decided to name his son Cristiano Ronaldo? OK, forget everything we just said. The man’s a berk.
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Premiership footballers? Not exactly the most likeable bunch in the world, are they?
Never has failure been rewarded so richly than in the top flight of English football. Apart from maybe the banking sector – but that’s a whole different story. They turn up for a few hours of training four days a week, play a match at the weekend and sometimes in midweek and earn a fortune doing it.
Sickening, isn’t it? Jealous? You bet we are.
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Cristiano Ronaldo is a nice bloke isn’t he? He can do six-hundred step-overs, give a cheeky wink, impregnate a penniless woman and then come up with the astonishing name of Cristiano Ronaldo for it (regardless of whether it was going to be a boy or a girl) without breaking sweat. What a guy!
