At time of writing, hecklerspray is unable to confirm or deny that popstrel Lily Allen successfully made herself something to eat last night, but indications are not hopeful according to her twitter feed.
The ‘voice of summer 2006’ has last night thrown the public into turmoil.
Not by “so closely resembling her Dad that you can’t decide whether or not you could smash her without thinking of ‘him’ and laughing about that Tourettes doc he did which would, like, probably put her off and that”, but with an astonishing dining problem.
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Terrible, terrible bland-meisters Coldplay have taken time off from providing the soundtrack to every tiresome Ikea-furnished dinner party hosted by those really ‘sincere’ friends of yours that you actually really don’t like (they’ve got white fairy-lights in their tastefully-decorated front-room for God’s sake) to raise consciousness for the homeless charity Crisis.
Whilst ignoring the irony that, far from ‘raising’ consciousness, they were recently named the band most capable of rendering most sane people unconscious.
In a further lack of any PR savvy whatsoever, the breathtakingly earnest dullards have chosen to drum-up interest in the cause by playing a ‘gig’ – surely more likely to repel – IN SECRET. Genius. Read More >>>
It's been a few weeks since Cheryl Cole left Ashley Cole for puking on another woman during sex, and you were probably hoping it was all over.
Wrong! Just because Cheryl Cole left Ashley Cole, it didn't mean that she's actually left him. Cheryl might even take him back, if she can get over Ashley breaking the sacred marriage vow about only splattering his stomach contents on her during sex til death do them part.
And that'll all be figured out today as Cheryl Cole and Ashley Cole have their dramatic make or break showdown. Which will probably be streamed live on Sky News for all the bloody attention it's getting.
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