To the uninitiated, OJ Simpson's current legal woe might seem inordinately complex – he stole some shit from some men, but only because he said the men had stolen shit from him, meaning that OJ Simpson was merely recovering shit.
Oh, it's so confusing that we think we need a lie down. Luckily it's not for us to make sense of OJ Simpson's alleged shit-stealing escapades, because that's for courts and lawyers and judges and whatnot to decide. Which is more or less what's happening now – a hearing began yesterday to decide whether there's enough evidence to take OJ Simpson to trial on all 12 of his charges. And if a trial does go ahead it's expected to be the biggest shit-based trial starring an unconvincingly innocent murder-suspect the world has ever seen.
Probably. It's not like we've researched it or anything.
