On the surface there might not seem to be a lot of difference between appearing on American Idol and waggling your naked penis in a homosexual's face for cash.

But that's where you're wrong, because... oh, actually, no. There really isn't a lot of difference between going on American Idol and the naked penis thing.

In fact, they're so similar that American Idol's head honcho has decided to allow David Hernandez - the American Idol contestant with a murky male stripper past - to stay on the show even though it's patently, patently wrong to do so. Surely American Idol contestants should start the slow depraved slide into humiliating public nudity after they've left the show, not before. Cosmic order like this should not be trifled with.