Jim Carey’s daughter Jane Carrey revealed on American Idol how she’s spent the past 24 years living in the lap of luxury, and riding golden ponies, all paid for by daddy’s money. Wait: we mean the exact opposite of that…
“He’s definitely not the most extravagant celebrity,” the daughter of rubber-faced comic Jim Carrey told American Idol viewers, adding that she’s a single mother whose been waiting tables for the last six years.
Ummm… what? There’s a difference between not being ‘extravagant’ and letting your daughter clean-up other people’s gobbed-out food for minimum wage.
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Oi! You look like a bright spark! You look like a regularly little sleuth who can work tricky puzzles out in the name of gain! A regular little Carmen Sandiego aren’t you?
Unless, of course, you’re more of an Inspector Gadget and continually mess things up, forever to be bailed out by your niece and her dog. Seriously. Have a word with yourself or you’ll end up with Matthew Broderick playing you in a film, and no-one wants that.
No, you’re needed to travel through time. Yes you are. You need to go back to 1780, specifically to Dublin, so you can find the missing barrel. WoooOOOOoOo. YEAH?
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Like coffee shops and vintage clothing boutiques, UK festivals are cropping up all over the place. The modern day music lover is literally spoilt for choice in terms of who they want to see perform in a muddy field. While festivals such as Glastonbury, T in the Park and V offer a mixed bag of artists, more genre themed events have emerged that include rock at Download, indie at Reading & Leeds and electronic at Global Gathering.
Now in its tenth year, Global Gathering has always pushed the boundaries of innovation to make sure it tops the previous year with an ever expanding range of electronic genres are being for catered for.
Well known and underground artists from the world of dubstep, drum & bass and electro have been recruited to make sure that no-one attending is standing still for more than five seconds. If you missed out on tickets, fear not, we’ve got our grubby paws on a pair and we really want you to have them.
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We have a winner for that competition where you could win The Town DVD and a boxset of The Wire! Isn’t that great? You wish you’d entered now didn’t you? Well, if you were following us on Twitter or Facebook you probably would have won!
And our ravishingly attractive competition winner is Sarah Harman from That London. She’ll now be able to sit in bed with her poindexter hat on and Mr T gold chain watching DVDs on her laptop, not quite able to find a way of being comfortable as she lies down to get optimum viewing angles. Hurray for that!
Do you like fictional crimes being solved by actors portraying the kind of folks who like solving crimes? Well, you’re going to drench your gussets with excitement at this competition where you can win a copy of The Town and a Wire boxset!
And you don’t really have to do anything! Just answer some stupid question!
Of course, the world doesn’t normally work like this. You normally have to earn things with graft, but with this easy chance to land some free stuff, you can feel what it must be like to be Paris Hilton or something.
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Thanks to your hideous face and your tremendous amount of chins, there’s a good chance you’ve spend many hours trying to make your Facebook profile pictures look half decent.
You continually try to fool people into thinking you’re actually good looking. Or funny. Or popular. hecklerspray knows your pain. Collectively, we look like the contents of a melted doll factory.
And so, in what is clearly an advertorial where you can win stuff, why not put all that time and effort into good use and get free stuff from Uncle Sony? Read More >>>
Oh joy of bloody joys! We ran a competition which required you dolts to answer a question which had an answer that could easily be found via the miracle of internet search engines. However, nearly every single one of you got it wrong.
In fact, the only person who got the answer right, was David Beasley from West Sussex!
And so, ‘Big Boy’ Beasley wins a copy of ‘Get Him To The Greek: The Extended Party Edition’ on Blu-ray, as well as copies of ‘Funny People’, ‘Knocked Up’, ’40 Year Old Virgin’, ‘Forgetting Sarah Marshall’ and ‘Anchorman’.
That’s nice isn’t it? We’ll be getting in touch with Dirty Beasley very soon! Expect a box full of DVDs and quite possibly a dead-crow coming your way soon! And don’t forget to enter our other competition as well where you’re told just how to be funny!
There’s a new crop of comedians doing the rounds, most of who are completely rubbish. However, one of them who actually provides us with laughs with his dry, sardonic wit, is Kevin Bridges.
He’s got a new DVD out called ‘The Story So Far’, which is a stand-up routine, as opposed to an ill-advised biopic about someone who has only been famous for a year or so.
And now, you get the chance to learn how to be a stand-up comedian (it’d help if you were even slightly funny in the first place) with our new competition… and of course, Kevin Bridges will be on-hand to make you a funny person. Read More >>>
