clint eastwood - HecklerSpray

Gran Torino Gets Off The Weekend Box Office’s Lawn

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

There are two types of Clint Eastwood-directed movie – the unpopular ones that everybody hates and the unpopular ones that win Oscars.

But now we can add a third type of Clint Eastwood-directed movie to the list – the popular ones. Because Gran Torino, Clint Eastwood’s newest movie, hasn’t just claimed the number one slot at the weekend box office, but it’s the biggest-opening movie of his career.

Perhaps Gran Tornio‘s weekend box office success will allow Clint Eastwood to direct more popular fare. We hope so, because then he could helm Marley & Me 2: Did He Do Six Craps On The Carpet Or Only Five?

Hey Everyone, Clint Eastwood Thinks You’re A Pussy

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

At the last count Clint Eastwood was roughly 6,000 years old – and yet he can still beat you in a fight, you pathetic pussy.

Yeah, that’s right. Clint Eastwood thinks you’re a pussy. You know that time you had an argument with your neighbour and decided to back off instead of attacking him with the back of a shovel? Clint Eastwood knows about that, and he thinks you’re a pussy for it. You pussy.

Clint Eastwood has given perhaps the best interview of all time to Esquire, and it’s all about how much of a pussy you are. No joke.

Creased or Folded? hecklerspray Tells You the Way it is

August 4th, 2012 By Chris Laverty

Five up, five down.

Folded:

The Sweeney on ITV4 in the day sometime (if you’re bored, ill or skiving)
British Style Genius (good set of programmes on BBC2. Good if you like clothes, of course, bit of a waste of time if you don’t)
Spiralling by Keane (officially we hate the song, but it would still work better as the new Bond theme than Another Way To Shat)
Gran Torino trailer (Clint Eastwood‘s upcoming film proves why he is still the rock hardest, baddest muddy funster in all the movies)

Breaking: Angelina Jolie Talks About Someone Else For A Change

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

We don’t know if we’ve mentioned it, but Angelina Jolie has a movie out – it doesn’t look very good, but keep that to yourself.

But, despite what you might think by the amount of time that she’s spent promoting the movie by hanging babies from her boobs on the cover of magazines, Angelina Jolie isn’t the only person involved in the making of that movie. It also happened to be directed by Clint Eastwood, whoever he is.

And in a shocking break, Angelina Jolie last night decided to do a little more promotion by paying tribute to Clint Eastwood at a Hollywood awards gala. In fact – and we’re not making this up – people were so shocked to see Angelina Jolie talking about someone that wasn’t her that there were audible gasps in the crowd. And some people fell over and vomited like in the opening titles to Quincy. Alright, we made that bit up.

Race War! Race War! Spike Lee Vs Clint Eastwood. It’s On!

March 25th, 2009 By Paul Sorrenti

It all started when Spike Lee complained that there were no black soldiers in either of Clint Eastwood’s Oscar-nominated war films Flags of Our Fathers and Letters from Iwo Jima.

Spike was upset that the African-American contingent didn’t seem to get any acknowledgement whatsoever from Clint, and he spoke up at the Cannes Film Festival in May.