Kiss did a song once with the lyrics, “I wanna rock n roll all night and party every day”. As old withering men, we feel that partying on down with Zimmer frames and emptying their overflowing piss bags doesn’t count as fun.

Just like The Rolling Stones, Kiss are one of those bands who seem to have been around for ever and won’t disappear. Their records are slowly becoming heirloom for millions of families around the world as this dinosaur band’s early recordings are passed down from grandmother to great granddaughter.

In the very beginning of Kiss’s existence, technology wasn’t much of a thing. The wheel had just been discovered and recording techniques were slowly being developed. Fast-forward a few million years and crazy Gene Simmons faces a problem for his band of nutty rockers. Blasted technology has bypassed the band and made it easy for followers of the archaic group to get a Kiss song for free.

This has angered chief Kiss man Gene Simmons wants to club anyone who has down this and stopped him from receiving his royalty payments of two sticks to rub together to generate heat for his homely cave.