Well this came out of nowhere – apparently professional wrestlers can be a bit dim now and again.
Staggering, isn’t it? But famous WWE wrestler Chris Jericho and cripplingly anonymous WWE wrestler Gregory ‘Hurricane’ Helms are only too happy to prove that point for you. That’s why they’ve both been arrested in Kentucky for drunkenly fighting each other in the back of a taxi.
Real fighting, too – apparently Chris Jericho and Gregory ‘Hurricane’ Helms didn’t even strip down to their pants, shriek scripted insults at each other or trade poncey little pre-rehearsed slaps that they both reacted to in an unnecessarily exaggerated way. So, goodness, they must have been drunk.
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The last time Mickey Rourke put aside acting to focus on professional fighting, it ended as badly as you’d imagine.
It ended with Sylvester Stallone‘s Get Carter remake. Ugh. But Mickey Rourke isn’t a man who repeats his mistakes – apart from the mistake involving him having haphazard cosmetic surgery procedure done on his face. And that’s why Mickey Rourke has decided he’ll no longer fight at April’s Wrestlemania.
We’re appalled. Without Mickey Rourke, who at Wrestlemania will provide our fill of tragic, borderline-decrepit ageing beefcakes who essentially make their living as performing monkeys? All the other wrestlers? Oh.
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Some would say that Mickey Rourke’s face looks like an uncooked hamburger patty that’s been trampled by a marching band.
But not us. We’d say that Mickey Rourke’s face doesn’t look enough like an uncooked hamburger patty that’s been trampled by a marching band. And we think Mickey Rourke agrees with us.
Why? Because it’s been hinted that Mickey Rourke – from The Wrestler, remember – will wrestle Chris Jericho at Wrestlemania in April. One-sided? Relax! After Wrestlemania there’s going to be a rematch to see who can sob the most incoherently on a beach, a bout that Rourke will easily win.
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Well this came out of nowhere – apparently professional wrestlers can be a bit dim now and again.
