Everyone can relate to Roman Polanski – really, who hasn’t admitted to a sexual encounter with an underage girl then spent 30 years on the lam in France?

And it’s this completely universal nature of Roman Polanski’s story that’s won him so many  supporters. The trouble is, none of them work at the LA Superior Court.

The court says that it’ll consider dropping dropping Roman Polanski’s charges, but only if he appears there in person first. And Polanski thinks it’s all just a big set-up to arrest him. Wow, who knew that alleged child-rape could be so exciting?

It’s been three decades since acclaimed film director – and owner of the world’s rubbishest life – Roman Polanski hot-footed it to France to avoid being sentenced for a sexual encounter with a 13-year-old girl that he’d previously admitted to.

And surely that’s punishment enough. Spend 30 years in jail and what’s the worst that you’ll have to suffer? An occasional bumming? The constant threat of stabbing? Compare that to what Roman Polanski’s been through in France – 30 years of exposure to creperies, accordion music and an almost galactic level of feminine armpit hair. Doesn’t the man deserve any human rights?

And that’s why Roman Polanski has decided that he wants the charges against him dropped. There’s apparently enough evidence to suggest unlawful conduct on the part of the deputy district attorney at the time, plus the woman who Roman Polanski allegedly had sex with thinks the charges should be dropped. Plus she’s in her forties and he’s 75 now, so it doesn’t seem that creepy any more. Well it does, but in a different and more legal way.

However, there’s one stumbling block between Roman Polanski living in exile in France and Roman Polanski living the life of a free man in America who has to stay indoors all the time because of the angry mob pelting eggs at his windows and screaming “BURN THE RAPIST WITH THE FUNNY VOICE!” at him – and that’s the LA Superior Court.

The court reasons that if it’s going to drop Roman Polanski’s charges, Polanski should at least appear there in person beforehand to explain why. And the trouble is that Roman Polanski thinks it’s all a cunning ruse and he’ll be arrested as soon as he lands in America to make his argument. Which is why Polanski’s lawyer Chad Hummel wants a judge from somewhere other than LA to hear the case, as AP reports:

In a motion filed Monday, attorney Chad Hummel sought removal of Polanski’s case to the California Judicial Council for resolution. He claims that statements by a court spokesman since the original motion was filed showed that the courts have prejudged at least one issue – whether Polanski must appear in court on Jan. 21 for his request to be considered. Such an appearance might make him subject to arrest.

If Roman Polanski’s demands are not met, he’s going to face a tricky decision – does he take the court at its word and go to LA despite the possibility of his arrest, or does he remain an exile in France?

It’s not a choice we’d take lightly, but we’re pretty sure that Roman Polanski will ultimately return to America, because it’s only there that he stands a chance of making the movie that everyone will remember him for – Big Momma’s House 3: Momma’s Inna Kitchen.

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