Lindsay Lohan is nothing if not a people person, so long as those people are male, Italian, slightly demented by lust and in possession of a tongue that they can waggle around inside Lindsay's gob.

Lindsay Lohan, you see, was in Capri recently for a film festival - something that she celebrated by snogging the arse off almost all of the island's men. Well, three of them at least - if accounts are to be believed, Lindsay Lohan managed to smooch waiter Alessandro Di Nunzio and actors Dario Faiella and Eduardo Costa all within the space of 24 hours. So it seems that Lindsay Lohan's type is Italian men from Capri. Well, Italian men. Well, men. Well, humans. Well, any living creature of any kind, really. Or objects. Any living creature or any inanimate object. We hope that's narrowed it down a little.

Another day, another man to cross off our ever-dwindling list of men who Lindsay Lohan hasn't got round to shagging yet - this time, it's Heath Ledger.

Reports are coming in that recently-single Lindsay Lohan and recently-single Heath Ledger have fallen into the sort of fairytale state of love that makes every waking moment feel as if they're riding through candy clouds on winged unicorns made out of gumdrops. Either that or Lindsay and Heath keep doing it with each other in a vaguely squalid way all the time. Either way, we can totally get what Heath Ledger sees in Lindsay Lohan - with the new Batman movie coming out in a few short months, Heath's going to need to really ratchet up the crazy for the promotion drive, and if he manages to absorb even 10% of Lohan's crazy he'll be scaring all the children for years to come.

Say what you like about Samatha Janus - actually, no, don't say what you like about Samantha Janus, especially if it's about how much Samantha Janus likes having lesbian orgies on drugs, because she'll just end up suing you.

And more than that, she'll end up winning - because Samantha Janus definitely, officially, legally doesn't like to have massive lesbian orgies on drugs, because that's what The Sunday Sport said about her and she's just won a giant load of damages for it. And let's hope that Samantha Janus' disinterest in having massive sweaty lesbian orgies on drugs also stretches to the rest of her EastEnders TV family, because that way we know that the frankly rather sickening mental images we've been having of Phil Mitchell all red-faced in the middle of a three-hour massive sweaty lesbian sex orgy on drugs will never manifest themselves physically.