by Paul Sorrenti
Heath Ledger Was Framed?A lawsuit filed in Los Angeles yesterday, by an unidentified freelance reporter from People magazine, claims that Heath Ledger was plied with cocaine and secretly filmed by a pair of undercover paparazzi.
It is claimed photographers Eric Munn and Darren Banks, back in January 2006, tricked Heath into thinking they were guests at the Chateau Marmont Hotel. Once they’d gained his trust the three men went into the room of unspecific People magazine reporter, where Eric gave Heath a ‘packet’ of cocaine.
Now you, dear hecklerspray reader, are no doubt like us, your dear hecklerspray team, in as much as you wouldn’t know a packet of cocaine if it was shoved up your arse by some dishevelled local upon a family outing to Botoga.
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by Shawn Lindseth
If The Empire Strikes Back had culminated with Luke Skywalker suing in a court of law to get his hand back, then that movie would have been more of a legal drama than a sci-fi fantasy. That’s just something we’ve been thinking about.
The jury could have been made up of those blue guys that play the flute and maybe a cute banana with eyeballs that roll back in his head when he’s hungry or scared. Now picture that banana on a lunch pale. Money. That’s money right there.
We’re 90% sure that’s going to be the premise for the upcoming live action Star Wars TV series. Luke finally gets his hand back in the second season and from then on he stores it safely in a split-open tauntaun. We just ruined the season-one cliff-hanger finale for you. 1000 apologies.
A cliff-hanger we won’t ruin for you is that the guy George Lucas is currently suing some guy for making Storm Trooper armor and selling it without permission – well that guy ends up being George’s father.
Sorry. 1000 apologies.
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