Wannabe Funeral Director and collector of used plasters Angelina Jolie,  has revealed that she dreads the day one of her 87 children asks to be excused from the family’s global travels, insisting she will break down in tears when it happens.

It seems Jolie and husband Brad Pitt, pride themselves on their nomadic lifestyle, settling for a few weeks at a time wherever their work takes them.

What’s that we hear you crying stupidly loudly? CHILDREN NEED ROUTINE! A STABLE ENVIRONMENT AND CONSISTENCY! What the hell do you know?

However, you may be correct as even Jolie knows that one day her children will want to live in one place and she can’t bear the thought of leaving one behind.

That’s right. SHE’D STILL BUGGER OFF ON HER ADVENTURES, WITHOUT OR WITHOUT THE FREE THINKING INGRATE.

She stopped doodling in blood on her wedding dress long enough to say:

“Right now they love it. If we’re in the same place for two months they wanna know why we’re not getting on an airplane. They really love to travel….Beacuse they’re such a big travelling pack….it’s not one child moving around the world and missing friends, there’s so many of them they have constant play dates and are always together…

“But I’m sure they’re gonna say: ‘Mum, let me stay home’ and when that happens I’m gonna cry…I don’t want to settle, I love travelling, but we’ll see.

We’re sure they’re going to say:

“HOLY FLOWERS IN THE ATTIC MUM!, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH UNCLE JAMES???”

She joked:

“They’ll probably end up living all around the world and my old age will be Brad and I travelling, trying to visit all our grandchildren in random countries.”

Brad was not available for comment, except to say that Jennifer Aniston is boring.

The whole world, whether it's ready to admit it or not, wants to be part of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's family so much it hurts.

And here's the best part – given that Angelia Jolie now adopts children faster than the global birthrate, eventually we'll all be absorbed into the Jolie-Pitt rainbow army. True, Angelina will force us all to change our names to something like Kakapow Flubnub to fit in with the others, but it'll be worth it.

Until that day, though, we'll just have to watch Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's last adopted son Pax Thien with quiet admiration, because he's just formally become a Jolie-Pitt. He's our tiny Vietnamese hero.

Pax Thien Jolie-Pitt has probably been through more than you, and he's only about three or four years old. He's certainly had more names than you. Pax Thien was born Pham Quang Sang, only for Angelina Jolie to swoop in, rescue him from his heroin-addict mother and rename him Pax Thien Jolie. 

Notice an absence of Pitt there? That's because the Vietnamese government doesn't let unmarried couples adopt children, plus it's also a big fan of The Break-Up and wanted to make the adoption process a little bit more complicated out of solidarity with Jennifer Aniston. 

Anyway, 10 months ago Angelina Jolie decided to let Brad Pitt on the act and started the procedure of changing the adopted tot's name to Pax Thien Jolie-Pitt. And now the name-change has become official, meaning that Pax Thien is stuck with his ridiculous name forever. E! Online reports:

A Los Angeles County Children's Court judge formally approved the camera-ready couple's adoption of four-year-old Pax Thien Jolie-Pitt on Wednesday. Pax is now a legally recognized member of the ever-expanding clan, which in addition to the superstar parents includes fellow siblings Maddox, 6; Zahara, 3; and Shiloh, who turns 2 in May. TMZ, which first reported the news, said the family held a mini celebration after the judge signed off on the paperwork at a courthouse in the Monterey Park area of L.A. Jolie reportedly left the facility with a teddy bear in hand.

And if you'd think that four Jolie-Pitt infants is quite enough, then let's not forget about the two unborn Jolie Pitts probably residing inside Angelina Jolie's womb. Let's just be thankful that both Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have jobs that pay millions of dollars for doing relatively little work, otherwise we get the impression that all six of their brood would be stitching footballs in a disused chicken coop to help pay the bills by now.

Read more:

Pax Officially a Jolie-Pitt - E! Online