Grown Up Gossip & Internet Villainy
One of my favorite comebacks of 2018 was Amanda Bynes. She recently did the cover of Paper Magazine, which was huge for her, given everything she’s been through with her mental health and drug addiction.
However, before her Paper Magazine interview she did an interview with Hollyscoop to clarify some of her 2013 trainwreck tweets, and ended up giving me my favorite celebrity quote of 2018.
The Haunting of Hill House
Aside from 2018 being a great year for horror movies, it’s also a year we saw some phenomenal horror/thriller television programs! The Haunting of Hill House! Castle Rock! The Sinner! The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina! The Terror! The Alienist!
This was a year where horror television shows, much like horror movies, were given nuance and heart, meaning they could really dig into some of the deep-rooted fears of the human psyche.
If you’ve read my previous blog about the Golden Globes, then you know I’m absolutely livid about Toni Collette’s snub for her Oscarworthy performance in Hereditary. I’ll talk more about that in a bit, but first I’d like to point out that what the Golden Globes also failed to acknowledge was that some of the best reviewed movies of the year were horror/thrillers.
Aside from the cinematic masterpiece that is Hereditary, you had A Quiet Place, First Reformed, the Halloween reboot, the remake of Suspiria, Annihilation, Upgrade, and Mandy: some of which broke box office records, all of which were praised by critics, and all of which were ignored by the Golden Globes. Ugh.
The Golden Globe nominations were announced yesterday, and needless to say, I was not impressed. Sure, a lot of cool and deserving people got nominated, but one key person was snubbed and that was Toni Collette.
This year, Toni Collette starred in Hereditary, a horror movie that is also one of the best reviewed movies of the year. Critics called it the new The Exorcist, and it was fucking PHENOMENAL. But what made the movie was just how fucking good Toni Collette was in it.
So, in last year’s HecklerSpray Advent, I listed all the Kardashian pregnancies as one of the year’s pop culture highlights, so this year I’m obviously going to list those actual babies!
Kris Jenner got THREE new money-makers this year with the births of Chicago (horrible name), Stormi (great name), and True (I’m indifferent).
No story that broke in 2018 brought me as much genuine joy as the news that supermodel/re-incarnation of a not-yet-dead Carla Bruni, Bella Hadid, and R&B bad boy, The Weeknd, were back together.
Since they made their debut as a back-on couple in May at the Cannes film festival, these two have been inseparable, and actually seem more into each other than they did their first go ’round.
Sorry sorry sorry. I know this was supposed to be posted yesterday, but I’ve got two kids under 4, ok?! Last year I predicted that, thanks to some cool upcoming projects, 2018/2019 might be the great return of Lindsay Lohan. And, in a sense, it kind of was.
Lindsay was in the media more than ever these past few months, however, it hasn’t been for her acting abilities, but rather her lack of dance ability (oh, and her attempts to kidnap some Syrian kids…ffs, Lohan).
I am literally SHOCKED that Hailey Baldwin…I mean, Bieber…is still alive. After bouncing from the dick of Shawn Mendes to get wifed up by Justin Bieber, I assumed every tween and twink in the world was making Hailey voodoo dolls and sticking pins in her eyes and chest, but, alas, she lives.
For a really long time, Hailey and Shawn Mendes denied that they were ever actually dating, and insisted they were just best buds. However, in his new Rolling Stone interview, Shawn confirms what we all already knew: he was clearly fucking Hailey Baldwin.
Miley Cyrus should be really pissed at Ariana Grande right now, but she probably isn’t, because they’re actually really good buds. But why do I think she should be? Well, Miley dropped the video for her new song with Mark Ronson, “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart”, on the 29th, only to be overshadowed by Ariana dropping the epic video for “Thank U, Next” the very next day.
While Ariana had the superior video, “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart” is the superior song, and shows off the best work Miley has done since Bangerz.
On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me: A Bieber who got married! That’s right, bitches! I may have been slack on my blogging these past few months, but the HecklerSpray countdown to Christmas advent is BACK! And we are ringing it in by celebrating some of the quickie engagements this year that turned into quickie marriages.
While Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson might not have made it down the aisle, Justin Bieber and Nick Jonas did! In fact, Nick Jonas got married TODAY!
