Elton John has written some wonderful musicals in his time – The Lion King, Billy Elliot, that one where Ben Stiller gets AIDS.
With the first one, Elton John really conveyed the majesty of the African Pride Lands. In the second he managed to capture the frustration of living in the north of England under Margaret Thatcher beyond compare, and the final one – well, let’s just say that there has never been a more hilarious, dance-in-the-aisle musical ever written about Ben Stiller getting AIDS.
No, really. Elton John’s writing a musical about Ben Stiller getting AIDS. To be fair, it’s too early to say if the Stiller/John AIDS musical will be the funniest AIDS musical ever made – we hear that Billy Joel‘s adapting Philadelphia into a showstopping musical for Jim Carrey, and the song Bumming A Man At The Cinema is supposed to be particularly rib-tickling.
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During the propaganda videos issued to promote Live Aid 2: Twenty Years On From The First One, we were presented with lots of images with Bono. This imagery was extremely powerful.
Starring himself and a whole host of people who appeared solely to boost their ‘caring profile’, Bono told us that ‘every time I and my mates click their fingers, an African child will die’. There was, of course, a simple solution to this: stop bloody doing it – don’t abuse your weird powers.
Aside from his world-saving duties, Bono likes to occasionally rock out with a little known Irish band called U2. Though named after some awful text speak, critics are saying the band could someday be big, if Bono himself were to shut up telling everyone off all the time and dictating to us, the lowly public, what we should do in life to save the universe.
Thankfully some people want to stop Bono bleating on and have launched a petition to stop him. We’re not sure how they intend to stop him, but hopefully it won’t be by freezing him. This would, of course, leave the possibility open for him to be thawed out in 3000 years. Imagine the unfortunate luck for the poor sods then. And would Bono be able to operate a flying car?
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