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So, What’s All This Hulk Hogan Gay Business Then?

December 13th, 2011 By hecklerspray staff

For years now, butch gay men have been modelling themselves on Hulk Hogan. Handlebar moustache? Check. Tight t-shirt with the sleeves cut off? Check. Flings with musclebound studs called Brutus Beefcake? Check?

Wait, what?

Yes, according to Hogan?s estranged wife Linda, Terrance Gene ?Hulk Hogan? Bollea had an affair with the aforementioned Mr Beefcake, a.k.a. Ed Leslie. The claims emerged in her recent book: ?Wrestling the Hulk?, which, incidentally is also the name of an obscure sexual practice featuring three men in ripped trousers and a vat of green paint.

Charlie Sheen And Brooke Mueller Want To Carry On Taking Drugs, For Their Kids

July 12th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Hey! You know how we thought that Charlie Sheen had gone boring and stopped taking all those lovely, mind-wrecking Class A drugs? Well, we might be in with a bit of luck here because it seems that he’s planning on consuming a lot more, which means he might go mental and die!

See, Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller have been piddling about with a custody agreement concerning some kids that no-one really gives two hoots about… and in this agreement, both have agreed that neither of this depressing duo should have to undergo random drug tests. Or organised drug tests. Or whatever other find of invasive, eye-watering drug tests there may be.

So are they both planning on being absolute drug wrecks, for the sake of their children? Well, mommy and daddy are awfully dull when they’re not throwing up their fix from the crackpipe or filled to the lid on coke while berating a chandelier.

Hulk Hogan Is Taking A Pasting Over His Apparent Wandering Member

June 29th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Everyone has got it in for Hulk Hogan at the moment. Ultimate Warrior (real name, ‘Warrior’ – no seriously) did a video sneering at the Hulkster and now, Linda Hogan is taking shots at the moustachioed baby-oil loving grappler.

Linda Hogan has made some pretty shocking claims in her new book Wrestling the Hulk: My Life Against the Ropes, but gave out some more elbow-drops on an American chatshow that you don’t need to know the name of.

Basically, while we’ll concede that no relationship is ever perfect, Hulk Hogan seems to have had a relationship that is incredibly odd indeed. Not surprising from a man who has earned his living by running around in his underpants and pretending to fight other men in the most homoerotic spectacle since Shaq took a bath with eight sirloin steaks.

Brooke Hogan Tries to Think Again: Fails.

March 24th, 2009 By Ian Dransfield

Being a member of the Hogan family would be great, if it weren’t for the fact that right now it would be rubbish.

The bright orange dad made of leather, Hulk Hogan, is in some trouble for trying to hide money from his mad wife, Linda Hogan, who’s going out with someone about three decades younger than herself, while the son, Nick Hogan, sits in jail for nearly killing his best mate and the daughter, Brooke Hogan… well – she just continues to embarrass herself.

Today it’s through the wonderful means of slagging off Paris Hilton via MySpace. What an age we live in! Though we can’t help but find it annoying – we slag that bint off more or less every day, and we have a go at the Hogans and we still don’t get national news exposure.

It’s a bloody popularity contest.

The Hulk Hogan Saga: Volume MCVII

March 24th, 2009 By Ian Dransfield

Hulk Hogan really should stick to the things he knows get people on his side.

Rip your flimsy vest off and expose us to your leathery pectorals, stomp around huffing and puffing and generally be unable to wrestle. That’s the Hulk Hogan we know and love. Though, to be honest, that kind of behaviour has become embarrassing over the last decade or so.

But one thing you shouldn’t – you absolutely should not – do is to say that your son ruining the life of a friend through reckless driving is “God’s will.” Just as Hulk did the other day. Oops.

Hogan Speaks Out On His Son, While His Wife Gets Off With a 19-Year-Old

March 24th, 2009 By Ian Dransfield

This time last year Hulk Hogan was probably a very happy (and large) man.

He had a wife, two kids, a huge house, a reality TV show, legions of adoring fans and an incredible moustache. Life was rosy for ol’ Terry, king of the Legdrop of Doom.

Then his prat of a son went and crashed his car while travelling at silly speeds, making a vegetable out of a good friend. Not content with ruining both his and his friend’s lives, young Nick Bollea went on to be incarcerated and was placed in solitary. Obviously, the Hulkster wasn’t too happy with this, but he kept up a brave front.