Britney Spears Isn’t Even Slightly Dead This is getting ridiculous. Michael Jackson has dominated the news to such an extent that there's no other news. Honestly. No news. The Iranians have stopped demonstrating to do a mass moonwalk in honour of Michael Jackson, Bernie Madoff only got 150 years in jail to commemorate a dance remix of Smooth Criminal that runs at 150bpm and even climate change is too traumatised to kill any more polar bears this week. So what news is there? Well, Britney Spears hasn't died. Yes, it's just like when Jeff Goldblum didn't die on Friday but, well, about Britney Spears. It's news, honest.