Grown Up Gossip & Internet Villainy
It must be hard being Pippa Middleton; trying to be a serious business woman and gallivanting around London, made all the more difficult because everyone knows you for being the one with the arse that stole your sister?s wedding day.
Poor, poor Pippa.
But a tabloid picture editor has come forward and announced that newspapers would be offered around 300 or 400 pictures PER DAY of the fitter Middleton, none of which are of her arse.
Jamie Oliver is a passionate man. He wouldn’t say that himself, mind you – he prefers the term ‘passthszszthionurnk’ – but he is.
And right now, the subject that Jamie Oliver has decided to get most passionate of all about is British drinking culture. Jamie Oliver has told a French magazine that he’s dismayed at how British people would rather get hopelessly drunk than enjoy a delicious platter of painstakingly-prepared food.
No shit Sherlock. Have you ever tried throwing a chair through a pub window after eating a big roast dinner? You’d be lucky not to get a stitch. Jamie Oliver, you really are an enormous goon.
When will Gary Glitter realise that his punishment isn’t over?
Yes, he served three years in a Vietnamese prison for molesting young girls, but when he eventually gets back to Britain – where seemingly everyone in South East Asia is trying to make him go – he’s not going to be able to sit back, relax and record his new album as he said he wants to.
Though we are convinced that being a convicted kiddy fiddler wouldn’t stand in the way of chart success.
But Gary Glitter is making it all rather hard on himself, by refusing to travel back to the UK to face his further punishments. Instead he’s running about like a paedo-Benny Hill from airport to airport around the Asian region he was kicked out of, being turned away from one country then the next as everywhere locks arms with the sole purpose of keeping him out.
Now we’re all for human rights, we can be surprisingly liberal and we believe in equality for all – but we can’t help but find all this delightfully funny. No one likes you Glitter, and no one wants you.
