Posts tagged as:

celebrity break up

Miley Cyrus Gets Blown Up And Bought By Dirty Men

by Joanna Bolouri

The world is a confusing place isn’t it?  So many puzzling questions left unanswered, that even the hecklerspray writers are unable to sleep at night. When we should be having midnight feasts and pillow fights, we’re pacing the sticky floors of our bedsit, desperately looking for answers to questions like: ‘Why does anyone under the [...]

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Miley Cyrus Hates Justin Bieber And Rebecca Black For Having It Easy

by Matthew Laidlow

Just the other day, we were putting together a list of the most individual singers and musicians who are currently involved in the music scene. How about The Rolling Stones? Nah, they’re just walking corpses. Lady Gaga? Pft, she spends too much time ripping off Madonna and designing stinging nettle dresses. You know who topped [...]

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Billy Ray Cyrus Seconds Away From Standing On Building In Batman Outfit

by Mof Gimmers

There’s nothing quite as depressing as seeing a divorced father in action and Billy Ray Cyrus is doing a grand job of being a constant source of maudlin fun. He’s a walking microwave meal for one. The poor sod. Of course, he’s limping around, hauling his lonely posterior to anyone who’ll listen because it is [...]

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Renee Zellweger And Sandra Bullock Hole Up For Grief Off

by Mof Gimmers

Imagine the fun you could have standing over Renee Zellweger and Sandra Bullock while they both sit before each other, taking it in turns to cry and do their best impression of melancholy. Just imagine! Well, that’s what has been happening as Renee took her peculiar face to Bullock’s house and let all the water [...]

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Renee Zellweger Grins To Mask Crashing Loneliness And Depression

by Michael Park

Renee Zellweger, a woman who looks as though she has a tiny black hole at the centre of her face which is slowly drawing all her features together, has this week been seen out of her house on her own despite being a celebrity! Being at our core, a gossip site, we too will manage [...]

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Billy Ray Cyrus Doesn’t Care What His Estranged Wife Thinks

by Michael Park

Country and Western megastar (and Miley Cyrus’ dad) Billy Ray Cyrus has decided to call off his divorce with wife Tish (yeah, Tish) despite not bothering to tell her. The well known peddler of country (without the ‘o’) decided to take his feelings to ‘The View’, the simpering nicey-nicey US version of Loose Women in [...]

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Pete Wentz And Ashlee Simpson Go To Court And Something Something Something

by Mof Gimmers

Lisping, limp-wristed rocknut Pete Wentz got divorced from candy floss brained Ashlee Simpson and everyone remembered how surprised they were when they heard the pair were getting married in the first place. What did some emo ballbag ever have in common with a glazed cherry of a woman? Apart from the mutual simpletonry of course? [...]

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Miley Cyrus Is Going To Have Her Credibility Ruined By Dating One Of Kings Of Leon

by Mof Gimmers

Miley Cyrus is in grave danger of losing any credibility she had in the world by associating herself with stadium rock ponces, Kings of Leon. That’s right. The Hannah Montana starlet has been flirting it up with the one called Jared Followill. Cyrus has had a tough couple of months, watching her parents split up [...]

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Billy Ray Cyrus Is Worried About Miley Cyrus (Also, Horse Missing After Someone Forgot To Close Stable Door)

by Mof Gimmers

Miley Cyrus has been having a good time. Not a ‘Charlie Sheen’ good time, but a good time all the same. She’s covered in tattoos, doing bongs and probably drinking enough to be drunk once or twice a week. With that behaviour, she’s firmly in the ‘average hecklerspray readership’ bracket. Provided she has a bath [...]

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Pete Wentz And Ashley Simpson Are Getting Divorced, Proving That Stupid And Stupid Doesn’t Always Go

by Mof Gimmers

Fall Out Boy’s Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson have filed for divorce because, in their own sweet way, they’re both insanely irritating and gaspingly thick. C’mon, ‘Champagne For My Real Friend, Real Pain For My Sham Friends’ is a song title so bad that the English language itself has reportedly tried to commit suicide. Of [...]

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