See, there are times when celebrities get angry at other celebrities – they usually mean a few cross words and not much else. We smirk at these times. We enjoy. We forget.

Then there are times when a celebrity unleashes a furious rant at other celebrities – and this is exactly what Roseanne Barr has gone and done, and in whose direction?

Why, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, of course. The easiest of the targets, as we all know too well.

The internet is a wonderful thing – once we would have to wait for weeks or even months to hear of the spats between two sets of people we don’t know and are unlikely to ever meet. Now, thanks to the popularity and ease of use of blogs, we get to know about even the smallest of arguments straight from the horse’s mouth.

Or Roseanne’s mouth, which – let’s be honest here – isn’t particularly horsey. More beastly.

Yes, she who was on that there Roseanne programme has gone and vented her spleen about the king and queen of celebritydom, starting out on estranged grandpappy Jon Voight but soon moving on to Brad and Angie, slating them for their adoption practices, their charity donations and their political opinions – or lack thereof.

Oh, and she’s only gone and included a passage that very much stands out as something a hecklerspray writer would be proud to unleash on the world.

On the other hand, it does make Roseanne seem utterly, utterly mad and throws the whole matter into question. If it were a reasoned and generally normal person making this post then maybe there would be more credibility behind it, but as it stands, it’s a mad old woman being a bit mad and old.

But who cares? It’s a funny rant! And it went a little something like this:

“jon voight your evil spawn angelina jolie and her vacuous hubby brad pitt make about forty million dollars a year in violent psychopathic movies and give away three of it to starving children”

Take into account this is printed verbatim, warts, lack of punctuation and all. But Rosey went on and unleashed this beaut, which has to go down as one of the finest sentences a comedian in the decline of her career has said about two top-of-their-game A listers:

“trying to look as if they give a crap about humanity as they spit out more dunces that will consume more than their fair share and wreck the earth even more. (just sayin’).”

It’s got venom, it’s got righteous fury and – best of all – it’s got a half-arsed, abbreviated semi-withdrawal at the end of it. That’s a sentence of kings, really. It demands respect while spitting out fury. But did it stop there? Did it bollocks. The ex-fake wife of John Goodman was obviously just hitting her (typing) stride:

“do you not know that the african daughter you hold in every picture had parents who suffered and died because of the republican party’s worldwide economic assault on africa over the last few decades since reagan?”

Obviously she went on even more, confusing us just as much as she made us splutter our Coco Pops all over our fancy new keyboard, but the choicest pick has to come from how she signs the post off:

“Ps….it might be good for your asian and african children’s self esteem to know you support a brown man for the leader of the free world.”

We can’t help but be conflicted about the whole thing. On one hand it’s utterly hilarious, on the other she does need to take a step back to take another look, calm herself down and probably have a nap, as she seems a bit cranky.

Either way, Roseanne Barr has amused hecklerspray for the first time in our life – marrying Tom Arnold didn’t count, that was a cheap shot – and that’s got to be worth at least something.

Read the Rest of it Here:

Roseanne’s blog

The whole world waits on edge, listening intently for the double baby-wail emanating from some crummy French town.

Everyone, no doubt, will demand to see pictures – and all magazines everywhere know this.

That's why there's such an intense bidding war going on.

And if you're the mag that offers the most money, you get the pics – along with a strange stipulation.

You could never print the term Brangelina behind your glossy cover again.

hecklerspray has been selling pictures of its kids since way before it was cool. Why, a headshot of our darling Wednesday fetched us almost ten dollars once – almost enough to pay for the two dozen multi-colored barrettes we had to buy for the shoot. We're not bragging about that, we just want everyone to know that financially we're wizzes.

Then celebrity baby pics turned into a fad, and even B-movie background characters tried hocking their spawn.

The golden pony of all baby pics though has got to be the two Angelina Jolie is about to simultaneously spit out while holding Brad Pitt's hand that isn't operating a hospital-room remote control.

So far bidding for them is around the $16million mark. The Pitt-Jolies are no fools. They know exactly how badly magazines want them – and that's why they've declared that contractually, the winning bid can never use the term 'Brangelina' again.

TMZ says:

"A source in the know tells TMZ that one of the conditions of getting the J-P twins' first pictures is that the winning mag is forbidden from using 'Brangelina'. Multiple sources tell us the couple hates the moniker — but no one more than Angelina."

Well, that'd be no loss to us. Our bidding participation ended at the $25 dollar mark, so we'll not be legally obligated to cease with all Brangelinas, but come August 4 we were gonna start referring to them as 'the Booger-lickers'.

It actually sounds good once you to use it in context. 'The Booger-lickers are starring in another movie together,' 'the Booger-lickers are having another French baby,' or 'the Booger-lickers have been voted America's hottest parents by Elle magazine.' See that? It's got zip.

Most of us don't get the reference, it's just something Stu announced at a fairly recent board meeting.