Articles tagged with: Brad Pitt
Ready for some more chances to make money from unhappy celebrities? Step right up. We're starting 2008 as we mean to go on, by crossing our fingers really hard and hoping that just about every celebrity couple in the land gets divorced and spends the rest of their lives wallowing about in abject near-suicidal misery just so we can make £12.50 from a lucky stab at a bet. And when we say 'we' we really mean 'you'. It's £12.50 that you didn't have before, at least. So here are the celebrity divorce betting odds for Jordan and Peter Andre, Madonna and Guy Ritchie, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, Liz Hurley and Arun Nayar and Amy Winehouse and Blake Fielder-Civil. Help, as ever, comes from Paddy Power...
State Of Play - the movie adaptation of a BBC mini-series that recently hit the headlines when Brad Pitt didn't want to be in it any more - has had another member-swap.
Now, thanks to Brad Pitt suddenly leaving State Of Play and Russell Crowe taking his place, production has been slightly delayed - and that delay has meant that Edward Norton has been forced to drop out as well. But, undeterred, the State Of Play team have laboured on and quickly signed up Ben Affleck to fill his shoes. And don't forget that State Of Play still hasn't started filming yet, so by the time it hits cinemas we can expect State Of Play's all-star line-up to include two Baldwin brothers, the girl from The Craft who wasn't Neve Campbell or the pretty one, a Chinese Highland Shrew and your Mum.
We feel for Brad Pitt, we really do - he must wake up every morning, look at Angelina Jolie sleeping next to him and think "Why didn't I stick with that ropey-looking girl from Romeo Is Bleeding?"
But even though Brad Pitt and Juliette Lewis are ancient history, it doesn't mean that Brad didn't leave an impression on Juliette. He did - it's just unfortunate that it was an impression of an underdeveloped pistachio nut hiding in a Brian May wig. Because Brad Pit, according to Juliette Lewis, has a little tiny penis. It's been reported that Juliette Lewis used the Brad Pitt dinky winky anecdote in the middle of a recent concert by her band The Licks in Seattle. And that's a piece of information that those seven people and one injured dog won't forget for a long time.
Former male prostitute Justin Randall Timberlake - aka Randy T - has thrown down the gauntlet to his sex-rivals George 'the Silver bullet' Clooney and Brad 'I'm going to kick your fucking face off' Pitt.
Randy T was recently handed the title 'King of Sex' by Rolling Stone magazine in exchange for backstage tickets to see him in action. Timberlake told Barbara Walters on her 10 Most Fascinating People special that he will defend his title to the death. Clooney and Pitt have taken this challenge seriously and arranged for a no-holds barred celebrity battle royale. Each of them will take it in turn to beat off as many men as possible to preserve the sanctity of their ring. The celebrity will the longest staying power will receive the coveted 'King of Sex' title belt.
Brad Pitt is continuing his quest to rebuild New Orleans in his own image - a bit like God did with mankind, only pinker and more bricky.
As part of his $12 million Make It Right campaign to build a series of cheap, sustainable homes to rehouse those affected by Hurricane Katrina, Brad Pitt has been to New Orleans to unveil a whole host of brand new homes that will... wait, that's not what Brad Pitt unveiled at all. In actuality, Brad Pitt unveiled a load of bright pinks blocks to obliquely remind people about the floods. But the houses are coming, honest, and Brad Pitt has pledged $5 million of his own money to build 150 houses by next summer.
Hang on, that's a good thing. This isn't what hecklerspray does. Damn you for not doing more stuff we can mock you for, Brad Pitt. Damn you to hell.
For an unmade movie remake of a political BBC TV show that anyone with a working internet connection can discover the ending to, State Of Play has been getting all sorts of fuss made over it lately.
Although, to be be fair, that isn't because State Of Play is a world-class movie in the making; it's because Brad Pitt stropped off production recently, right before it was due to start filming. But now, with Universal planning to sue Brad Pitt for the walk-out, State Of Play needs a new leading man, and fast. Step forward Russell Crowe, who Universal has been desperately wooing all weekend. Of course, Russell Crowe is a notoriously safe pair of hands, and won't demand constant script changes like Brad Pitt reportedly did, apart from requesting that his character performs a 25-minute multi-stanza poem about the fickle nature of material success right in the middle of things.
And that 30 Odd Foot Of Grunts performs the State Of Play title music.
And that the whole thing gets called Russell Crowe's State Of Play and is set in prehistoric times, and that Edward Norton's character is replaced by an otter in a baseball cap.
When you look as much of a slow-thinking himbo as Brad Pitt, it's much harder to convince people to let you star in intelligent, thought-provoking, Oscar-winning dramas, because people always see you as the pretty boy from Meet Joe Black.
So when Brad Pitt announced that he was going to star in a movie adaptation of State Of Play, the blisteringly well-received BBC thriller that made a star out of Bill Nighy and won a slate of awards, it looked like Brad Pitt had finally got it right - he was making a film that was serious enough for him not to be taken merely as eye candy but not so serious that its constant sermonising turned audiences away. Not that it matters now because Brad Pitt has walked away from State Of Play right before filming was supposed to start and the studio wants to sue him. But Brad Pitt will get the last laugh because he'll still get to show off his acting chops in the movie he's making instead - Mr Pretty's World Of Doe-Eyed Gazing.
When Angelina Jolie made Beowulf, she knew she was making the tricky transition between 'ultra-earnest humanitarian actress' to 'mostly-naked computer-generated Old English mythical half-sex lizard from the year 700 AD.'
And of all the transitions a woman can make, it's probably the hardest one - one minute you're crying over pictures of sad third-world orphans and the next minute you're having your head chopped off by Ray Winstone's virtual sword in a sexy way - but it's one that Angelina Jolie can make without even breaking her stride. And how did Angelina Jolie do this? By turning up to the London Beowulf premiere in a pair of leather trousers so skin-tight that her bum-stitches burst wide open, forcing Brad Pitt to spend the rest of the evening trying to cover up Angelina's arse-spillage with his hands, that's how!
