Boycott - HecklerSpray

Jane Fonda Proves That Left Wingers Are Just As Mental As Those On The Right

July 18th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

People on the far left of the political swingometer of shit, have this insane belief that they are on the side of The Truth. Those on the far right are aware that they have unpopular views, but are still just as mental.

Both are unified by a need to lash out at an imagined enemy, kicking the shadows and swearing at the air. Republicans think that foreigners are not to be trusted, and Democrats think that this is just racist talk.

On the left, we find Barbarella. Or, if you prefer, Jane Fonda. She’s had her appearance on QVC pulled (things are tough, right?) where she was to promote her new book on ageing, and she’s wagging her finger at ‘extremist groups’. Familiar language, eh?

Paul McCartney Wants You To Stop Eating At McDonald’s, Please

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

$Paul McCartney, McDonald\'s, Boycott, vegetarian, picure, beatles, liverpool$ Having seen off the threat of Islamic terrorism with his recent Israel concert, Paul McCartney is now going after the real menace – the Fillet-O-Fish.

Paul McCartney has chosen to summon up all the energy in his wrinkly little body to call on his fans to boycott McDonald’s. Not because of the deforestation caused by the fast food industry’s mass farming practises, though, or McDonald’s aggressive child-centric marketing, or even the potential health risks inherent in a predominantly fast food diet.

No, Paul McCartney wants everyone to boycott McDonald’s because someone put a photo of Paul McCartney up in a Liverpool branch without asking him first. Come back next week, when Paul McCartney tries to ban abortion because he heard that someone who aborted her pregnancy once hummed three notes from Love Me Do for one and a half seconds in a shower on her own in 1975.

Noel Edmonds Tells BBC To Shove Its Licence Fee Up Its Bum

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

$Noel Edmonds Licence fee Boycott BBC Noel\'s HQ$ Your money used to fund Noel Edmonds you know – his gunge, his annoying sidekicks, his helicopter, his mansion and his funny little beard.

It doesn’t any more, though, and Noel Edmonds has got a right old cob on about it. Now that Noel’s made his ‘glorious comeback’ – which mainly involves ordering dimwits to open boxes on daytime Channel 4 and banging on about orbs of energy like some kind of swivel-eyed fairground huckster – he’s decided that everyone at the BBC is a great big idiot and so he doesn’t want to pay his licence fee any more.

So Noel Edmonds has stopped, because of what he describes as the BBC’s ‘threatening’ behaviour. It’s an impressive outburst, not least because the whole world – including Noel Edmonds – knows that Noel Edmonds would probably agree to host a show called Noel’s Donkey Masturbation And Anthrax Hour if it could be on BBC One again.

Everyone Gets All Sad About Being Crap At Eurovision

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

In case you missed the news, the UK is the rubbishest in the world at Eurovision – even rubbisher than Spain’s creepy Elvis-geek.

On Saturday the UK Eurovision entry Andy Abraham came joint last – along with some nondescript Germans and a Polish tooth machine who looks like she bathes in Ronseal – causing Terry Wogan to mumble furiously about political block voting and boycotts and even his own resignation if our crap songs weren’t taken as seriously as mainland Europe’s crap songs in the future.

And now Terry Wogan’s outraged warcry has been backed up by none other than Bruce Forsyth. Old men grumbling about stuff? Who’d have thought?

Naomi Campbell Boycotts That Airline That Banned Her Forever

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

OK, we take back every single bad thing we ever said about Naomi Campbell – she’s finally convinced us that she’s a genius.

We mean it. Naomi Campbell is a genius. Only a genius could do something as flat-out berserk as what Naomi Campbell’s just done.

Recently Naomi Campbell was banned from flying with British Airways for life for spitting on a policeman in the middle of a violent tantrum about luggage. So, naturally, Naomi Campbell has made a huge point of boycotting British Airways, even though it’s already banned her. Seriously. Indiscriminate violence and a dangerously flawed mental process? We can’t figure out why nobody’s married a catch like that yet.

Golden Globes Gets Put Out Of Its Misery?

March 31st, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Thanks to the ongoing writers' strike, shows like 24 have been indefinitely postponed much to everyone's disappointment – but on the other hand the Golden Globes might be cancelled too, so it all evens out.

The Golden Globes – the all-singing, all-dancing, glitzy, foreign-voted cousin to the Oscars – is set to take place on Sunday, but the writers' strike means that it will be boycotted by all the nominees if it gets televised by NBC as planned. And now the Hollywood Foreign Press Association is pushing NBC to not broadcast the awards at all so that the stars won't face picket lines on their way in. Of course, without cameras there to capture them in their pretty dresses and painstaking make-up jobs, there's a good chance that the cast of Desperate Housewives will disintegrate into clouds of dust at some point during the ceremony, but that's the chance they'll have to take.