Aren't we all lucky people right now? Frankie Cocozza is off the streets for the next few weeks so we can all get over that bad bout of crabs that we can't seem to shift, Adele has a new boyfriend so we might not have a song that isn't the worst sort of melancholic bollocks available and Lady Gaga has promised us a new album appearing sometime this year.
She doesn't have name for it yet, and even if she did, we wouldn't find out about it until she cryptically posted a video entitled ?le title prologue? or whatever bollocks language she thinks is so vogue right now, or has all the World?s press stepping on her toes, dying to get the slightest piece of information out of her tightly wound lips.
And we don't mean the ones that's-a on her face.
Donald Trump is a man of many talents; he pioneered the modern day comb over, he discovered that President Obama was actually a Senegalese street cleaner called Babacar Ousamane, causing him to resign from the Presidency and is rumoured to have been the man who killed Kim Jong-il, with a Chuck Norris style roundhouse.
