You should never rip off one of Jay Leno's jokes - mainly because it's bound to be so unfunny that you'll lose your job, be dumped by your girlfriend and end up dying alone on the streets.

But also there's a chance that Jay Leno will sue you and win. And that's what's just happened. Jay Leno has just won a lawsuit against Judy Brown, who published compendiums containing jokes stolen from his routines.

And as a result Judy Brown will have to publish something less funny instead, like... nope, there isn't any less funny than one of Jay Leno's jokes. 

Ever since Harry Potter was conceived, JK Rowling has insisted that his story was only seven books long - except that now it's over she's starting to wonder if it could stretch to eight.

By writing the final Harry Potter book at some point over the last 12 months, JK Rowling scored herself a runner-up spot on the Time Person of The Year List - she would have come first if it wasn't for that bloody Vladimir Putin - and that seems to have made her wonder out loud about writing another Harry Potter book. Don't get too excited, though, because the new Harry Potter book is at least a decade away - coming after the final Harry Potter movie, the opening of the Harry Potter theme park, the Harry Potter On Ice tour and the vastly unsuccessful Harry Potter Sings Julio Iglesias CD of Spanish language seduction ballads planned for March 2014.

Because it's Christmas time, it's time to wander around the high street like everyone else to try and buy presents for your cherished loved ones.

Well that’s a lie - actually you have to purchase stuff for relatives you see once every three years who still call you Jimmy by mistake and who keep on getting you a Now compilation CD because they think its “cool”. Anyhow, at the end of December your bank balance is as dry as the turkey your mum serves up on Christmas day and you don’t have any money to go out on New Years Eve even though everything is overpriced and generally shit anyway. However, somebody out there has too much money. Instead of lending us a tenner so we can do better than buying supermarket-brand aftershave for our dad, they’ve only gone out and spent $4 million dollars on the JK Rowling book.  

As humans, it's only natural that we look at Britney Spears from time to time and think "Golly, someone really did a bang-up job of raising that little delight to be a well-rounded and conscientious member of society."

However, our feeling of admiration at the exemplary way that Britney Spears was raised into the angel she is today is often tempered with a deep burning resentment at the fact that, no matter what we do, we'll never be able to bring up our children to be anywhere near the glowing standard of saintly humanity that Britney Spears has set. So we can't believe our luck that Britney Spears' mother Lynne Spears is all set to publish Pop Culture Mom: A Real Story of Fame and Family in a Tabloid World next year. It's basically a how-to manual for anyone who wants to raise their kids to be just like Britney Spears. We're especially looking forward to the chapter about pushing your young child relentlessly through the machinations of fame at the obvious cost of her mental safety.

No, wait, that's the whole book. Our mistake.