When you have a family that you’re ashamed of, it’s easy to want to look beyond their faults and love them for just exactly who they are. That doesn’t mean, of course, that if you have a relative who ‘enjoys the company of children’ or has ‘buried another relative under their patio’ that you shouldn’t report them to the proper authorities. hecklerspray does not encourage the harbouring of criminals.
We look forward to the creepy comments on this column, where you suggest that you wouldn’t mind being touched up by Bill Gates.
With the help of Windows, you can now treat your entire family as though they’re criminals by lining them up for an identity parade and taking a series of pictures of them from all angles with the intention of creating a family that one doesn’t automatically associate with being a host of dribbling morons with all the mental capacity of a lobotomised Janet Jackson fan.
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Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg is apparently a really nice guy. Him and some of his nerdy mates have pledged to give all their stupidly vast fortunes away to noble causes either during their lifetimes or after their death.
Presumably this is so we all forget all the data and privacy problems Facebook has been plagued with recently, plus the way Zuckerberg was portrayed as the world’s biggest bell-end in David Fincher’s film, The Social Network.
Bill Gates, the lord of the geeks and former one man bank came up with the scheme to get the obscenely wealthy to say they’ll give their billions away at some point down the line to benefit the less fortunate, with his wife Melinda and some fella named Warren Buffett (who we’re reliably informed is some sort of investment banker, you know, like Chris Bates from the Apprentice). Read More >>>
Microsoft founder, philanthropist, and now crazed mosquito farmer. Bill Gates has done it all.
You heard us: Bill Gates this week released a jarful of mosquitoes into the air at a technology conference. As yet unproven rumours have it that he then began pulling on the elaborately waxed moustache he has taken to wearing while beginning to chuckle, gradually crescendoing into full belly laughs.
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